Is the business suit jacket length back in? Damn. The cropped ones are better for us big butt girls.

How did he ever land the lovely Deborah Roberts?

Oh, Moe, it gets worse when you have children. You're forced to be with other mothers for playgroups, playdates, birthday parties, and other nonsense. So now instead of sitting on your ass in a bar drunkenly "bonding" over gossip and men, you're forced to engage in inane conversations about kid topics while your…

Why does Renee Zwellweger always look like she just had a shellfish reaction?

My experiences

Hey - how 'bout a photo contest Caucasian Jews can be included in?

@heykoukla: No, it doesn't.

So why did such a nice Jewish girl design a logo that looks like a medieval crucifix. I can't wear those to temple!

She has Heidi Klum's body: short ribs, high waist, tall hips. Looks strangely out of proportion. I never could understand why they call Heidi Klum "The Body."

Lauren Bacall is so kick-ass, I can only imagine how embarrassed she is by the spawn of her spawn.

I tried to get the line Milly in my shop and they were complete snotty twats. Same goes for Tibi.

There was a 500 lb dude who used to work in H/R that wore that exact same headband. Because he spent the whole day sweating.

Oh please, Heather Locklear playing 40? Maybe in dog years. She was Drew Barrymore's mother in "Firestarter," and Drew was like 5 at the time.

Seriously, did JFK Jr suck all of the hot genes out of that family? Have you ever seen an attractive Kennedy, Shriver (Skeletor!), Skakel, et al? Besides John John.

My theory on DVF suing Target: they approached her to do one of their designer capsule collections, she wanted too much money, and they balked. Now she's exacting her sweet revenge.

My Christian Syrian husband "looks" more Jewish than I do. He teases me about my Jewfro which cracks me up. He'd never heard the word until he met me. Actually, he hadn't heard many Jewish terms, and now uses "mitzvah" and "mensch" quite frequently.

Someone please explain to me the difference between these "vegan" shoe brands and Payless? Besides about $500.

He's holding on for dear life, lest he fall off his platforms.

Aw, the littlest Pepper. Wouldn't you like to be a Pepper, too?

Oh, sweet mists of Aquanet. That's the first mascara I ever bought. Lethal in the hands of a 13 year old. Glamorous me c.1983 = Frosty coral Cover Girl lipstick and Dial-a-Lash set on 8 (I was going for demure).