I thought Breath of the Wild was boring. basically just a bunch of extremely light RPG elements tacked onto an archaic formula. I stopped playing shortly after leaving the opening area because I was wondering what the hell was the point? 

Wait...did you actually finish the game? The final person he kills is himself. Or at least attempts to, and releases the hope that was within him out into the world that has now been undone by the deaths of the gods. Essentially a retelling of the myth of Pandoras box. Kratos did finally grow, realizing that the best…

Oh for the love of- The original games had all of these key components built into the story. The plots of those games worked because apart from the bombastic insanity of the gameplay you had a story of a violently angry man who is continuously pushing himself forward for no other reason than his need for revenge. He…

I smell an inevitable reboot/spiritual successor to Space Cowboys, call it Space Cowgirls and cast Helen Mirren and Cate Blanchett and Meryl Streep and whoever else and you’ve got gold Jerry, Gold!

Counterpoint: Connerys Bond, followed by Moore’s Bond, was a bumbling buffoon who continuously almost got killed due to his bafflingly high level of incompetence. Why in the fuck does he decide that the best way to infiltrate Goldfingers inner circle in Goldfinger is to immediately get on his bad side, when it was…

It can be two things

Look, the new AV Club doesn’t ask questions when Cardi B’s publicist drops off the suitcase full of money. They just do what they’re told.

So then would this make Cardi B Gabo or Poochie? Both seem to be fitting. Although based on what little I’ve seen and heard of her she seems to be introducing an outrageous paradigm, and has been rastafied by about 70 percent

Last I heard (Which was admittedly a couple years ago when Alpha House first started) he was just putting the strip on hiatus for a few years to work on other projects, I don’t believe he’s officially cancelled it yet. Edit: just looked it up and the strip is still being made, it has just transitioned to new strips…

Is this website just trying to make me feel like an out of touch old person today? I graduated from High School six years ago! I’m only 25! Why does every headline today read like it’s been written in some kind of indecipherable alien language to me?

You mean that currently run right? Because I will fight you to the fucking death over Calvin and Hobbes! I also quite like Bloom County, which is actually currently running, but most newspapers are too square to carry it. Oh, and Doonesbury is good for a laugh, but I’m not going to bust a bottle over someones head for…

25 years old and I’ve already reached Abe Simpson’s “I used to be with it” stage

“It sure was nice of Wal-Mart to give us these complimentary Wal-Mart drinks for saying Wal-Mart so many times”

It’s not the bringing in outside food, it’s the viral internet videos of people lugging in a picnic basket like “look at what I’m getting away with”. Also as a theater goer I generally hate everything about theaters almost entirely because of everyone else who goes to them, the average theater goer is rude,…

I still have only a vague understanding of who Cardi B is, and am struggling desperately to understand why I should care. From what I can gather from osmosis she’s basically a one-hit wonder who we’ll all eventually turn on like every other one hit wonder, either that or she’ll endure by continuing to make awful…

There are unspoken rules about this stuff for those of us who aren’t punk asses. Candy is fair game if you can fit it in your pants pocket without it being noticeable, but popcorn or soda if you really need it is something you buy from the theater. This has gotten ridiculous, if you want to stuff your face with food…

Um...The premise of his most popular show is highlighting the work of small business owners across the country. Yes his personality is outsized and over the top, but if you’d ever actually watched the show you’d know he keeps the spotlight clearly on the restaurant and their food, serving primarily as color commentary…

The “did Fieri actually like it” game is the only way to watch the show, it’s like trying to read a poker player, but like any card player, Fieri does have some tells. Usually when Fieri just start going into heavy detail in describing what goes into making the food he’s not really digging it too much. On the other…

I just dropped by with present for warming of house. Instead, find you grappling with local oaf.

You’re right, Skeletor would probably also be watching Colbert, he likes people who tell it like it is. Weirdly enough he’s also a Trump supporter, so there’s a bit of an internal conflict for him. He swears he’ll be turning things around in 2020 though, when he runs for President with Beast Man as his VP.…