No, the only real option is for studios to shoot many versions of each film, spanning a wide range of genres, and then distribute spliced-together meta-trailers incorporating all the various versions. It’d be great — you’d never know for sure if the two leads would end up together, like Harry Met Sally, or eat too…

Consider:

I did too; I didn’t mean to single it out. I think conspicuously excessive fandom is weird, period. My friend also decked himself out in Transformers gear most days (he was in his late 20's the last time I saw him), which to my mind was much, much worse. But I could just as easily reference my own past obsessions,…

I suppose porn studios are as entitled as anyone to patrol for piracy, but somehow it never occurred to me they would even bother; somehow I assumed it was regarded as an unavoidable reality of the industry. I’m just old enough to have spent a couple of sweaty summer afternoons exploring pre-Giuliani Times Square (I…

I think you’re onto something. I tried watching Clarissa at the start of the pandemic (for the first time in maybe 25 years), and gave up ten minutes in. It was like, “Na na na na na... nah.”

Oh, I know Pete & Pete; I liked it very much when it was on, and I enjoyed it again on DVD years later (I even went to an AV Club-staged cast reunion). But I don’t think I qualify as an obsessive, and I’ve never heard anything about obsessive fans. Hence my curiosity.

The cable company called me a few years ago to let me know they were aware I’d downloaded a film illegally. I asked them what film, and they said Annabelle: Origin. “Oh, shit,” I said. “I think I know who that was.”

I’m curious about these “eerie” followings — sincerely. Freaks & Geeks? Pete & Pete? It seems strangely plausible, but is there anything specific you can point to? Have you met such people?

It’s...fine.

It may be one behemoth vs. another, but at this point I’m happy to see Apple beaten up a bit by whoever can do the job — and I say this as a (more or less) loyal customer of 30 years.

We bought Tekken Tag along with our PS2, then basically played only that for the majority of the following year. For weeks at a time, in fact, we’d just play the bowling mini-game, which even my sisters went nuts for. Eventually my brothers found other titles they wanted, but these were mostly RPGs, which have never…

...Nanoprobes?

Solid firstie.

Literally the only film reference to Dave I can remember was in, of all things, Sister Act: Bill Nunn (R.I.P.), as an annoyed F.B.I. agent, asks Whoopi Goldberg if he’s going to see her “singing on Letterman.” It was an unexpected line, but as a kid, I liked the movie more for it.

I do appreciate helpful explanation of views.

It’s not personal, sir, as I don’t believe I know you — the who and else of it matters not at all. If I did know you (and respect your opinion to begin with), I suppose so bare a response may well have been of some value to me. But even then: such dismissals do little to help discussion threads turn into the sort of…

Pro tip: It’s not.

I get this sort of response more and more on the A.V. Club the past few years. I think that’s a shame.

Seinfeld walked away. Cheers ended gracefully. And they’d probably have let the Friends stay on TV for another decade. Is The Simpsons so different, just because we can’t see the actors age? It’s not like they won’t keep making money off of it forever regardless.

Here’s an elegant solution to basically every problem The Simpsons has faced in the last ten or fifteen years: cancel The Simpsons. At this point you’re not just plugging holes in a sinking ship, guys; the ship has sunk. Even you know it. Maybe try something new, keeping in mind it’s a new world. You might just do OK.