Hippos are goddamn terrifying and I fully expect that the handler in the video has since lost his arms and life.

Meh, I think we should just exercise naked like the ancient Greeks.

The Walking Dead turned into The Wire so slowly, I didn't even notice...

I think that since Gawker has ‘broken out’ and become a nationally recognized site, they have essentially started actively pandering to generate page views...and yes, I think a lot of the writers there are incompetent. I’ll use yesterday’s “Baltimore Councilman on CNN-Just Call Them N——rs” article. The headline is…

Or you can just lounge naked. No ruined clothes and you can eat those food particles. What's that? Yes, yes I am a decrepit hermit...

Good, good. Unleash your hatred, young Skywalkers...

This will never be in-greyed, but I think it's laughable that the best coverage of this horrible situation is from Jezebel and Deadspin, as opposed to Gawker itself...congrats Denton, you've got your page views, but leave the actual valuable commentary to the niche sites.

Quotas and the general concept of ‘broken windows’ policing are bullshit. If you tell someone they have to make 10 arrests a week, they are going to find a way to do exactly that. It’s like some kind of horrible feedback loop, in which the cops have to make arrests, choose to make easy arrests to get the job done, and…

There are two types of college students-jocks and nerds. As a jock, it is my duty to give nerds a hard time.

Yes, but when will a celebrity self-identify as a geek, dweeb, lameoid, goober, or the dreaded dorkus malorkus?

Hey buddy, did you get a load of that nerd?

Me fail English? That’s unpossible!

This really makes you think about what future generations will think uncovering our artifacts. I had a teacher in high school who hypothesized that 500 years from now humans would look at traffic circles as centers of society-after all, all roads are leading to that point, right?! Basically, are future humans going to…

Yeah, this. I was going to post how I found it baffling that there had to be some sort of dichotomy between ‘Awesoman man and football player Ray Rice’ and ‘Shitheel-For-Life Ray Rice’. Forgiveness isn’t about erasing the past. It’s not like we should all just say, ‘Well, he seems better now and his wife is still with…

Is it possible to set to up a hate-tour if Seattle? Where we can partake in some craft beer and do artisanal pickles and snark on everyone else?

You can pay half the rent and live nearby in Tacoma. And instead of trying to decide between 100 craft breweries and artisanal sandwich shops, there are only 10 here!

Give this man the $10,000!

South Dakota is one of the coolest ‘flyover states’ and should be visited by all...As opposed to North Dakota, which is a barren hellscape and should be sold to Canada to pay down the national debt...