Just as his boss is the average YouTube comment section in human form.

Best reaction comes from the Tampa Bay Lightning:

As a native of Southern California, I like the part where you said you “drive” on our freeways. Most of us just park there.

+1 Kongratulations on this kontribution.

All hail the Commandurine Chief

Right? Adding “gate” just shows that the speaker/writer doesn’t understand that Watergate was a hotel, not a scandal involving water.

Starred for your final paragraph.

Not that any Kings skater not named Jeff Carter is having what could be called a great season, but in Muzzin’s case, this is arguably his worst year so far. His point production is way down from the pace he had for the last two seasons (0.27 points per game compared to 0.49 and 0.54 in the previous two years) and he’s…

“And by ‘full scholarship’ we mean ‘full confession’...”

Goddammit. I was going to use this. Begrudingly, +1.

I feel like your last sentence needed more emphasis, so I called in the Oldman.

Is the Bishop of Leicester Jamie Vardy or Claudio Ranieri?

Well, the goalies were pretty good at it.

Exercise is important, but you’re right that a lot of people have this notion that it’s either entirely about eating healthy or entirely about exercising. Both play a role in improving and maintaining one’s health. I just think exercise is not something that requires a monthly payment, and with my job and my life, I…

True. I had a gym membership for a long time that I never used. I called it my “fat tax.” It is far better to spend that monthly fee on food that is healthier than the crap I used to eat, and I lost more weight that way than by going to the gym.

At least CNN had the sense to edit out the part where the computer asked the hacker if he would like to play a nice game of chess.

As someone who lives in Orange County, I can confirm that most white voters here do in fact have a fresh, steaming dump in their diaper.

This checks out as good kinja.

Also, he was around when dirt was invented.