Every week I hyperventilate the second I see Midweek Madness is posted, and every week I plummet into the depths of despair when I see that, once again, my dog is not in the Double Creature.

My mom was never shy about telling all four of her kids that we were accidents. According to her, my dad would hold a baby at a party, look at her a certain way and then BOOM she was pregnant. I wasn’t aware that people actually planned and worked really hard for their pregnancies until much later. And boy, don’t I…

Or Cnut! Bring back Cnut!

My dog is a dead ringer for Julia Louis-Dreyfus.