Actually, she was pointing that out but she also said it should have been "found guilty" not "suspected", which is what I was speaking of - he's been convicted, so there's no "suspicion" involved.

If he was convicted of rape, there isn't really any "suspected" involved. Unless he raped some women, and coerced five other women into sex. And while it's unclear, that doesn't seem to me like what they're saying. So yeah, that phrase is all kinds of weird and badly written, at best.

Man, this guy is this upset about 10 days?

I realize this was supposed to be last night's thread, but I missed it due to going out to see The Grand Budapest Hotel (so good).

I didn't read that comment, but that's a pretty odd case. I'd be interested in hearing the argument for why they won't date trans people.

I've never heard of someone having an attraction based on biological sex, who was truthful about it. HS said her friend was a lesbian. She isn't attracted to trans men who have taken hormones but haven't had SRS (and therefore, have vaginas). I'm uncomfortable with her being attracted to trans men who haven't…

Yes, cissexists and homophobes make words so much tougher for those of us who really understand (or at least are trying to) these issues. Myself I tend to just identify as queer, but if pressed I'd say pansexual. Not that anyone outside my partner, the few people he's come out to, and this site know I'm anything but…

That's true. But it's not always consistent. For instance, in the New York Times article referred to in HermoineStranger's post, on bisexuality, there is good talk about how Robin Ochs recognizes non-binary genders within talking of bisexuality... but on the NYT's excerpt for the article on the NYT Magazine homepage,…

Sorry. I had meant that to imply differences in preference, small or large. But yes, butch and attraction to it is definitely much more complicated than sexual attraction. I probably would have been safer to talk about being turned on by more "masculine" or "feminine" men/women.

This is a tricky debating point. What is gender? I haven't heard any genderqueer people argue that if you aren't a girly girl, you're GQ. I have heard cis and even some binary trans people argue that a femmy trans man isn't "really trans/the gender he identifies as" and "why did you bother transitioning?".

In defense of HS's friend, my reading is that she isn't open to dating a trans man who's started hormone therapy (and therefore would have made some steps toward a masculine-presenting body), even if they still have a vagina.

Oh btw, off topic - I'm sincerely sorry for the comment on not blaming lesbians for not trusting bi-women. I didn't mean it that way, but it wasn't right to say.

Sounds like you fall somewhere within genderqueer, yeah. Start looking around the net, maybe writing about your own feelings, and take your time figuring it out. Don't rush.

It's very complicated. We use "pre-transition" because he hasn't had any surgery or hormone therapy. Once he's in the middle of it, my inclination is to say "in transition" (but it will ultimately be his choice - his transition, his rules), and when he's done, which will be without getting bottom surgery (SRS), that…

My partner and I have used "pre-transition" to refer to his current physical state, but this does bring up the tricky question of "what is female-bodied"? If a trans woman has had top surgery but not bottom surgery, and considers her transition complete at that point, it sounds like your friend would not consider her…

You're not being an ass at all, don't worry. You're curious, and that's a good thing.

Pansexual is often used by people who recognize that there are genders beyond male and female - bisexual is seen as a term that implies a strict binary gender view.

Terminology really is so difficult. I sometimes read the tumblr blog of a very intelligent-seeming trans person (in Germany I believe, I'm not sure if that's a part of it) who prefers to use CAFAB and CAMAB (coercively assigned female/male at birth) to refer to what I've generally been taught as FAAB/MAAB. I've also…

Chick flick might not be exactly right, but my point is that Hollywood dismisses female-oriented movies as unimportant even if they do well, unless they get a lot of male viewers.

I'm not arguing with you. Women's opinions are written off. If a film has an overwhelming majority of female viewers (ie. Twilight), it's viewed as a chick flick.