Dream job.

Frankly, I agree with that statement every single minute of the day.

Oh, great, now I don't have to fear for my life. I'm actually gonna read the book when life can slow down long enough for that to happen.

Is this an American Psycho thing or are you genuinely terrifying?

Better than, "my dad went to the store for milk and never came back."

The guy I lost my virginity to idolizes Lil Dicky. Good thing he has a condom sponsorship, or I'd definitely have a ginger baby right now.

Vomits on a paper and calls it a lineup?

Wow, not used to seeing this line used on someone other than me.

Coincidentally I also slept like a baby through American Psycho. Since I was one month and five days old when it came out in theatres.

Oh, please, tell me, Elizabeth, how exactly does one suck a fuck?

With this logic, every juggalo on Earth would be dead. And the world would be a much better place.

I mean, I'm going to be lying intensely if I don't just leave Disney running the majority of the day. I rarely ever change the channel, unless Tangled or some movie I've seen a million times already is on, to be honest.

Well I'm spiritually eighty six, so.

When I was fourteen/fifteen, I listened to nothing but The 1975 to the point where I physically recoil when I hear their first album.

So who's playing the unnamed celebrity who allegedly tied her to a chair and tried to leave her to rot, Genie the feral child style?

Yogurt is the new enemy of the alt-right. And apparently Papa Roach. And other men fucking their wives.

Any kind of yogurt that is vanilla Chobani with honey coconut granola is delicious, legal crack to me.

Yogurt is all full of shit.

The literal apocalypse: more cultured and healthy than Alex Jones.

I see your B- and raise you an AV Club grade: A. Especially since they don't usually do album announcements around these parts; whoever gets to review this is going to eat Phoenix's ass while they do it.