This reminds me of that episode of Weeds where Nancy was a maid who left a golden shower fetishist sitting in a prostitute's pee because he was out of cash.

My parents decided I could finally know what that song was about. Now I can't listen to it.

I listen to Soul Meets Body and Dashboard on average three times today each, so this kinda explains it.

I was just thinking, our metric is Metric. God, what an underrated group.

AltNation on Sirius is going to eat this up. Finally something to play except The 1975…not that I'm complaining about that either.

I invented self loathing and so like, you know, I'm probably going to die by way of self loathing.

I prefer to be Hugh J. Dick

And as usual, God has never ever ever taken the right person.

We watch Milo too, and it is pretty great. Last night however it was Liv and Maddie. For some reason my mom loves it a little bit too much.

Me too, every time I watch it.

"…Of course you did."

i am always surprised when i can bring myself to actually, genuinely laugh during the big bang theory. usually i just am like, "so hey, family that i love, what's on the dvr that isn't this?" and then we fight because everyone likes the big bang theory except me. i also do not like superior donuts or 2 broke girls;…

It's been a running joke that my dad laughs at the jokes on Bob's Burgers more than he laughs at me. Hell, my dad laughed more at some random Disney show more than he laughs at me.

That's a pretty good metaphor for how my friend group currently consists of my best friend from middle school and her boyfriend, actually.

I feel like Coach.

He was actually pretty decent in Bee Movie.

1. Making me cry literally everyday from only trailers
21. Being a racist c*ntwaffle

A script on how to tell your kids people are different: "Kids, some people are different. They may not have penises like you, or have non-white skin, or like to kiss boys even if they are boys."

I guess we have to join them since we can't beat them.

When I am very bored, I read TV Tropes and try to place my friends in them. Imagine my surprise when I was the token black friend.