Archer/Hooray./Archer

Shut up

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO EXPLAIN TO MY 5-YEAR-OLD SON THAT TWO GROWN MEN CAN’T GET DRUNK BECAUSE BUD LIGHT COSTS $10?

The 2,632 consecutive tweets also served as a nice tribute to Cal Ripken Jr.

Oh really? Ever read Cardinals Twitter when the tram’s losing? And comments about Kolten Wong’s eyes?

You forgot to say something racist and/or homophobic and misspell “Busch”.

They thought Yordano Ventura was pitching tonight.

The family has asked for lack of privacy during this transition.

I think you meant chAir Force

C'mon, Feebs, that's below Air Force standard. It's like you want us to make fun of you.

Also, isn't being Christian a choice? Because they don't seem to mind beating people over the head with that decision...

Actually, that is a good point, thank you for correcting me. I should have said that she does not conform to typical standards of female appearance, which goes beyond just dress.

I'd rock the Hawaiian shirt and anyone who wouldn't is wrong.

Joke's on you, asshole - there are 10,000 UVA grads named Clayton Hunter!

"on a steady diet of White Castle burgers and pizza"

Why is "eat less" a perfectly valid way to get a dog to lose weight, but tell a human that and they go into crazy denial with a whole slew of excuses and claims that you are fat shaming them?

It was incredible night for our son and kudos to the tennis greats who are not only phenomenal players but such great sports. What a memory our son will have and an experience to match. We are truly grateful that he was given the opportunity not only once, but last year as well when Djokovic called him up against…

My Brazilian friend made $91,666.66 per minute working less than 1 hour! No college degree required. To find out how, just go to this website: www.BigOrangeBBall.EZMoney.com.

I don't know why anyone is doubting Fab Melos smarts, I just checked his basketball-reference page, he played 36 minutes in the NBA and made 3.3 million dollars. Sounds like a genius to me.