I completely disagree. I'm not saying the Danny character is an abusive asshole, I'm saying this guy I knew was. Shoving his dick up her ass "on accident lololol" when he knew she did not like it was just one of the ways he degraded her and took her agency in the relationship.

Statistics indicate that bad shit is more likely to happen IN CERTAIN PLACES.

And somehow she is never talking shit about the homophobe or the Domestic violent asshole. It's always about the woman who criticized her work.

So, I used to feel like that about my boyfriends. And then I came to terms with the fact that I'm gay as fuck.

Funny how I've never had anyone tell me that doorbells have ruined inviting friends over.

Funny that she mentioned "presumed" states of being. It reminds me of how women are presumed to be consenting unless otherwise stated.

I am finally growing out of this. Buying my first house by myself and breaking up with the boyfriend who, even now after two years, is shocked and appalled when I get mad. I'm a little scared- being 30 and single wasn't something I expected when I was young and dreaming- but mostly? I'm excited. I feel so much more…

But that girl also grows up and learns it's better to be real than cool. And without suggesting that the end result for everyone is to pair off and settle down, most people do mellow with age. And they do settle, just more easily into their own complexities, more easily into something less prone to typecasting.

Yes, that makes sense. I think someone else in the thread made a comment about how some dude described her as "being one of the guys" and how that was not actually a compliment and how she was being somehow rewarded for rejecting female stereotypes (even though that was not her intention).

My friend told me about a woman comedian she saw once who had a bit about "chill" girls in her show. About how guys just want a girl who's "chill," just so "chill," meaning laid back, doesn't diet or wear makeup, and hangs with his friends... although at the same time must be forgiving of everything, still skinny and…

This is right on the money. I very much used to be (or try to be) a Cool Girl. Looking back on it now, I did it for two reasons: 1) to distinguish myself from other, "less cool" girls, whom I found pathetic and irritating for needing things, and 2) because I was desperate for male attention.

Only a couple times in my life have I asked a woman who was otherwise a stranger for her number. My romantic/sexual encounters have exclusively come through meeting a friend of a friend, and something developing from there.

You should have long since stopped thinking that liking beer was a notable highlight of your personality, is my point. And I say this as someone whose boyfriend just returned from the GABF — that doesn't make him cool, it makes him a person who likes beer.

Yes, yes.

I've only known one Cool Girl, who is still a good friend. A reformed stoner turned marathon runner, the mom who still curses and drinks a beer with gusto, who complains about her husband's motocross hobby, who worries about her kids being bullied, and has written a novel about her high school days that made me…

AND I SAID THAT A SIMPLE RATE COMPARISON IS MEANINGLESS WITHOUT THE CONTEXT OF OTHER CAUSAL FACTORS, WHICH, WHEN TAKEN INTO ACCOUNT, SUGGEST THAT THE BIGGEST CAUSAL DEMOGRAPHIC FACTOR OF VIOLENT CRIME IS POVERTY.

If you're a feminist, I'm the Tooth Fairy.

Do you get similarly upset when actual people are colors and genders other than White Male? There's, like, no reason for that whatsoever!

Mhmmm, I've had many men tell me I was the one to make them actually think about feminism and such issues.

And how does a person respond to something like this? How does a woman who started reading this website as a teenager, who used to seek refuge here when her ideas about gender and equality were shot down by her friends, peers, and sometimes even family, who for some reason imagined this place as being a center for…