Hey, it’s hard work keeping Zombie Deadspin alive.

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Hey, they are with you guys!

Plus 20,000 Barry Petcheskys 

So they used “sports to stick” it to the man?

May I suggest a new Deadspin mascott, Sticky; The Stick-to-Sports Stick. Sticky lives in Jim Spanfeller’s butt.

It doesn’t get much better than this, Luis.  

Sticking it to powerful people who are fucking up a good thing with disingenuous pleas to “avoid controversy” and “stick to sports” is a good thing.

True story: I had an electric leaf blower I used for a number of years. Last year as I held it in my hands, it started to catch on fire. I did not notice at first. (The fire was at the back of the unit where the cord plugs in, and I didn’t have my eyes on that part). Destroyed the unit, AND my $50 extension cord, and…

True story: I had an electric leaf blower I used for a number of years. Last year as I held it in my hands, it…

Does this leaf blower have as much suck power as G/O media?

Does this leaf blower have as much suck power as G/O media?

The answer is none, because leaf blowers are noise polluters with no valid function that cannot be easily replaced with equipment less offensive to everyone around you, not to mention your own physical health.

Leaf Blower: The Official Rake of Garbage People

The answer is none, because leaf blowers are noise polluters with no valid function that cannot be easily replaced…

The best leaf blower is NO leaf blower. These things have become a scourge on cities and neighborhoods everywhere. The emissions from using a gas powered leaf blower for 30 minutes apparently is the equivalent of driving a full size truck 500 miles. But there is even more harm in the dust that is kicked up by these…

The best leaf blower is NO leaf blower. These things have become a scourge on cities and neighborhoods everywhere.…

The best leaf blower is a rake. Rakes are the best because they’re great for moving leaves, but they’ll also ‘rake’ up acorns, pine cones, sticks, and even small branches. Even better, they’re nearly silent (especially compared to a leaf blower), and they use zero fuel and create zero pollution. As an added bonus rakes…

The best leaf blower is a rake. Rakes are the best because they’re great for moving leaves, but they’ll also ‘rake’…

None. Leaf blowers are terrible. They are noisy pollution machines whose sole purpose is to turn your problem into someone else’s problem while depriving your soil of the nutrients it needs to prevent you having to go out and spend good money on artificial fertilizer. The electric ones are only 18-25% less terrible,…

None. Leaf blowers are terrible. They are noisy pollution machines whose sole purpose is to turn your problem into…

I hear that jim@g-omedia.com is the authority on leaf blowers. Or is the vulture capitalist responsible for the scummy auto-playing video ads plastered all over this blog and for disappearing posts complaining about same. One of those two things.

I hear that jim@g-omedia.com is the authority on leaf blowers. Or is the vulture capitalist responsible for the…

How did this get on Deadspin? What does this have to do with sports? Is Paul Maidment aware you are publishing non-sports stories?

How did this get on Deadspin? What does this have to do with sports? Is Paul Maidment aware you are publishing…

A rake.  No noise, no maintenance, no issues with batteries or running out of gas, and works better than blowers in many cases.

A rake.  No noise, no maintenance, no issues with batteries or running out of gas, and works better than blowers in…

Tercius, my favorite leafblower is either G/O Media editorial director Paul Maidment or Jim Spanfeller.  They both blow really well, but I’d say they suck a lot, and hard, too. 

Tercius, my favorite leafblower is either G/O Media editorial director Paul Maidment or Jim Spanfeller.  They both…

Pro tip: the best leafblower is emailing the nutsacks at G/O who are pushing auto play videos and ads (g-omediafeedback@googlegroups.com) and telling them how bad they are at their jobs.

Pro tip: the best leafblower is emailing the nutsacks at G/O who are pushing auto play videos and ads…