When ghost riding the whip goes wrong. 

Apparently your brother thought that if you could dodge a screwdriver, you could dodge a ball.

My cousin was helping to pull up the old floor from my brother’s cabin when we were rehabbing it. At one point, there were basically only the floor joists to walk on, and of course my cousin manages to fall between them, plummeting a full story into the basement, with a crowbar in his hand.

“Kids, gather round my wheelchair and let uncle Other Guy tell you why I wear this eye patch and can only move the left side of my body.”

Imagine the story you would’ve told if you hadn’t caught it.

That there is some quality, high-velocity, action-packed fisting.

You can find it at “the roller coaster Shambhala in a Barcelona theme park”.  Hope that clears things up for you

Well you have plenty of time to learn now that you’ve been fired from work for googling “fistball.”

I think the fistball rabbit hole is still illegal in North Carolina. 

He’s still my optometrist though I got lazik so I don’t see him much anymore.

Not on the first date, mister.

Going solely off of that video I’m thinking it’s tennis rules: One bounce allowed. This game looks to combine volleyball with tennis which sounds awesome. 

Questions, in descending order of importance:

!!! this is nuts!! if deadspin has to stick to sports more now i demand this be one of the sports stuck to

it’s like volleyball, but big!

I used to attend punk shows and there was this one dude who wore sports goggles a la Horace Grant in the 90s. I think he was trying to avoid your problem. 

Are your arms heavy as well?  Is there perhaps vomit on your sweater already - possibly Mom’s spaghetti?

Can’t, I’m at work.

“Mine!” -Kempf

*murdered by Portland Timbers fans*