Winning one game is a pretty low bar you’ve set. 

The Division Championship year was good. The Zach Thomas/Jason Taylor era was fun. The first few Wildcat games were a blast.

That’s my thing; if you’re gonna tank, embrace the tank. Fitzpatrick is exactly good enough that he’d get the Dolphins to like, 3-2 and roughly in the playoff conversation, and then they finished 5-11 and fall out of the top 5 of the draft. If you’re gonna lose, lose with your chest.

I’d probably put them up around 4 and shift everything else down. Wait, no, dolphins are rapists so slot them in at 10. Because fuck Pats fans.

12. Actual dolphins, who didn’t sign up for this shit. 

One would think a clearly tanking team might be an opportunity to see whether the young unproven quarterback you just traded a second-round pick for a few months ago actually has potential or not, so you have some idea of what your quarterback situation might look like as this rebuild progresses.

Or, that guy can just…

Surprised he could even answer. I couldn’t speak clearly for a week after having my Tunsils removed.

Proposing a ballot measure that if Miami goes 0-16 no member of the 1972 Dolphins can ever drink another drop of champagne. 

Are you fighting a comment war on many fronts and misreading my post as an attack rather than a discussion on the subject?

> The Steelers were fine last year

Spanos’s net worth is $2.4 billion, and the chargers have other minority owners who could chip in if need be. I don’t think they are really running up against resource constraints.

The solution is for the team to pay him. They can absorb the cost in any event, they likely have three or four more years of Gordon’s prime, he could easily be a valuable player beyond that, and they have certainly extracted significant surplus value from him during his time on his rookie contract. 

Can is a verb there. 

Bill Belichick will sign him next week and he'll be a three-time All-Pro for New England

I mean, have you seen NBA refs?  The no-name guy could literally get stabbed and not get a call while shooting...

I mean sure, if the other 10 guys on the field are all committing holding penalties and the one guy left unheld is the cornerback on the opposite sideline to where you’re running, maybe.

Even in the event that you touch the ball, you’d right away learn what “unguarded” means in a NBA sense. Either you’d just be throwing it up blindly or you’d be taking a guarded shot because it would take .3 seconds for one of those 6'8 guys with a 8 foot wingspan to close in on you.

the foul-drawing is key. I’m bonking into the defender and flailing my arms and hoping that the ref has a vendetta against the opposing team

If the other players are taking it seriously, no way do you ever get passed the ball.