a) Donald Trump is STILL stuck on Hillary Clinton

http://www.politifact.com/truth-o-meter/statements/2013/nov/22/harry-reid/harry-reid-says-82-presidential-nominees-have-been/

Reminder: McConnell’s Republican Opposition Congress filibustered 79 Obama nominees before Reid went for the nuclear option.

*insert comment here about how we are supposed to feel sorry for his base*

Go to the gift table, leave a card saying “What a beautiful day! I hope you enjoy the gift!”, then take half a dozen cards off their gifts, and scatter them.

Getting rid of environmental regulations to save coal jobs is like getting rid of animal abuse laws to save the horse and buggy industry when cars were invented.

I have always wanted to be in the Cash Cab. My only true calling is Random Urgent Trivia—every time someone is casually trying to retrieve a name or fact, my mind starts an internal game show where I must figure out the answer because EVERYTHING IS ON THE LINE.

Barack just wanna sit under his own vine and fig tree, a moment alone in the shade, at home in this nation he’s made, one last time.

Jesus H. Fucking Christ. When will we learn that business ideals (i.e. you vs. me) will never work in human endeavors? This is a gross and tawdry and hurtful experiment.

“Well, everyone knows a book can’t turn you gay. What this book presupposes is . . . maybe it can.”

I’m not sure if I’m relieved or terrified that the Republicans running our government are so incompetent that their evil health care “replacement” died in 17 days.

I notice that Neil Gorsuch has two children. Only two, which means either he and his wife ceased intimate relations after the birth of the second child, or they used some form of birth control.

Not to mention “Birth Control” does not just prevent pregnancy. I went on hormone therapy when I was 11 because I was bleeding so badly I was passing out, missing school, and starting to have serious anemia-related issues.

Which is fucking amazing since they ALSO think that a pregnant employee is a drain on company resources and a huge liability. So which is it, you fucks?

how you gonna threaten me with a gift, don?

Hillary didn’t lose because she didn’t go to Wisconsin. She lost because she’s a woman.

To give you a sense of how much Republican lawmakers care about women, take this vignette from Senator Pat Roberts today. When asked by a TPM reporter if he supported repealing Obamacare, Roberts sarcastically responded, “I wouldn’t want to lose my mammograms.”

Spoiler alert: men assaulting women in the bathroom (anyone assaulting anyone in the bathroom) is already illegal. It has absolutely nothing to do with letting trans people use the bathrooms for their intended purpose (you know, like all humans need to).

Simple. He tried to vote in a way that protected himself. The Trump voter voted in a way that let the wolves in. You’ll counter with “But they thought it would help”...to which I just note that there was plenty of information out there to tell them otherwise.