Oh god I finally got one! Okay, scene: post break-up with my partner of 7 years, at a large New Years party full of mutual friends out in the middle of Texas-nothing-for-miles country. At this point, I’m ready to move on from my ex asap, in the form of a casual hook-up. I’ve had my eye on a dude who lives in another…

One time I made out with this guy who I could tell was super young but I didn’t care because I was drunk and bored. I thought he looked familiar but couldn’t figure from where. The next day I realized he was the ex-boyfriend of MY ex-boyfriend’s youngest sister, who was like...9 years younger than me. SCORE. Thank god…

When I was 20, I was working at a bookstore and living with my boyfriend, who also worked at the same bookstore. It was a small bookstore, with only 7 employees and when the holiday party rolled around we all went to a bar in Montouk and proceeded to get ripped. I had lost track of my boyfriend and started to make out…

Did you ever know that you're my hero

What an ice-cream cone dick. That’s going to be my new go-to insult.

I was so happy to ungrey this one. Praying I never encounter one of those dicks in the wild.

This was perfectly written. High five. And also, ah, what a guy, AMIRITE LADIES

In college my roommate and I decided to throw a generalized “winter” party. We cut out paper snowflakes, put Christmas lights everywhere, holiday colored jello shots, etc. We had about 50 people in our tiny apartment, had an awesome party, cops came, people had to leave, yada yada yada...

1990, I was taking some time off from work and touring with the Grateful Dead. I had just finished a three day run in Denver and between then and the New Year’s Eve show in Oakland, I was hanging with some friends up in Whitefish, Montana. I was way into this friend, Steve, and he was marginally into me. We had hooked…

So you may not have hooked up in the traditional sense, but if you don’t win I’m writing Madeleine a letter.

I was pretty notorious (in my own mind at least) for hooking up with co-workers after drunken holiday parties. At one such party I had flirted shamelessly with the good-looking company delivery driver-slash-musician (they were ALL slash-musicians in Seattle in the ‘90s) (yes, this was years ago and I considered such…

I like to call this one “Culture Clash”.

Right after my divorce was final, I traveled back home for Christmas. A few old friends found out that I was in town and wanted to meet up for dinner and drinks.

Home for the holidays in 2009. Have recently completed my first college hookup. Am feeling accomplished and worldly. Decide to actually go to “the channel” aka a creek 20 min away from our hometown where my classmates drank in high school while I read and googled Expedia fares.