well shit...thats a double dog dare.....I can't back off now!

I'll forgive you if you send me a blueberry pie...mmmmmmmmmm pie

gifs are great!

Honestly at 37 weeks eatin isn't that enjoyable. Your intestines are cramped so you get full really quick, making eating a daredevil act of "am I eating too much?!" more often than not I over eat and feel miserbale

I think i will do this!! Or just stare them straight in the eye and say "I'm not pregnant" and hold for a really uncomfortable long pause

there is this bar near my house that serves the BEST mulled wine, the only thing holding me back is judgmental stares from people. Plus I hear it can induce labor..hmmm i may throw back one glass

Oh sister, I'm masturbating hahaha that's good to go. I actually can't bone because i'm really tender down yonder. My OBGYN was like "uhh good luck with that taint massage, give it a shot, but considering what I'm seeing, it may be incredibly uncomfortable"....well not those words exactly, but the gist

psh...37 weeks pregnant, unable to drink my annual mulled wine, stretch marks all up on my ass, horny, but unable to bone because my vagina is angry for enjoying sex 37 weeks ago. What can I do other than sit here and gestate?!?!

I loooooooooove talking dirty...my husband..not so much. It can make the difference between me being able to climax or not. Sometimes I just want to be called a slut you know?? for funsies

"I will do those things of which you ask." ....goddamn i'm sexy

Ugh, fuck that noise, my dad tried to pressure me into inviting 'so and so' because it would offend them. I was like NOPE!!! Don't know them, don't talk to them, don't care. I'm sorry you had that experience. A wedding is something special, if I want to spend the money to have you there is because I value your company…

Nothing enrages me more than people who can't RSVP. For my baby shower, that I wasn't even throwing, I had to hunt down some folk to see if they would be coming. I was like WTF. For my wedding, I had to hunt down people because they couldn't be bothered to check a box and put an already addressed and stamped envelope…

Hahahha I should do that! Cross my fingers and hope some sense is made

Same here, Ive done a few marathons and half marathons, I always have to carry my rescue inhaler because without fail, I will have to use it

I had read that this is a weaker vaccine than previous ones, also requiring more boosters (some of which people aren't getting), but it still helps

Im gonna have my kid in about 4 weeks (hopefully she doesn't take her sweet ass time trying to get out). My parents have not been supportive in getting their TDAP. It's gotten so bad I basically had to tell them via that if they don't get it done, I'll have to limit their access to their granddaughter until she gets…

Have you ever tried pulmacort or qvar? That stuff is amazing, I use it all the time (I'm using pulmicort now because of my pregnancy), it's fantastic and reducing the amount of asthma attacks because its preventative. WHen I don't use it regularly I find myself using my rescue albuterol all the time.

This, just because it's easy for you doesn't mean it's easy for me. It's pretty simple.

I can't diet with my husband who can pretty much eat whatever he wants and keep his fine ass "brad pitt from fight club" body intact, where I look at a piece of bread and my ass gets big. He's an usurper of diets, telling me "oh honey you can totally eat that burger" then when I start complaining about my weight he'll…

Psh side eye, my mom has passed down her flawless resting bitch face...its glorious and so effective