And like 14 viagra probably.

literal same.

I respect you so much for this admission.

“I promise not to ask you for money after I move out of your house”

I CARE. I CARE ABOUT MY LADY BONER.

The things I would do to Indiana Jones would make that heart burning crazy man in Temple of Doom blush.

Still would.

DO IT DO IT DO IT

Goddammit I just got all my wisdom teeth taken out and it was expensive and shit! WHY DOES DENTAL CARE COST SO MUCH

There is not a single promise I’ve made to my father that I’ve ever kept and nothing gives me more pride.

My tooth really hurts.

He served a little less than one year in jail and remained on probation for the next five.

Bitch why don’t you get pregnant then

If money were no object I would spend my birthday buying shoes naked and snorting coke off hookers.

She is cooler than I could ever hope to be tbh

why do you know this

I’m serious what was she talking about.

The birthday party or

But you have an awesome dog and a soul not sold to the paparazzi so who is really winning here?

Dude tried to force a person in a wheel chair to stand during his concert.