What I want to know is...

The real St. Louis cop figured it out when the imposter didn’t shoot an unarmed black man.

Don’t forget:

“Reince Priebas”

“The store’s General Manger”

Does that make Mike Pence stupid, the same way Trump not paying taxes makes him smart, and the rest of us stupid?

I have the Elliott Gould or Carl Reiner character. And I hear she’s (suddenly) available...

Sounds like a job for Anonymous / Russian Hackers.

Thanks, Trump.

“told Mr. Trump that he should consider a parade up Fifth Avenue.”

I went along for many minutes with one of these callers ... finally I confessed that I was just trying to keep him on the line so that was one less person he could scam. He said I should go fuck myself. Very calmly I explained that I didn’t think that was physically possible. He laughed and we had a good chat.

I thought she would have supported Deez Nutz.

I’m guessing you have daughters, right?

I agree. But it sounds like that San Bernardino terrorist’s wife led him to do it.

SNL is live, right?! Alec should stay in makeup/character and, perhaps during Weekend Update he should read @realDonaldTrump’s inevitable tweets of his opening 45 minutes earlier, and elaborate. Or show him in Trump Tower watching his own SNL skit and tweeting.

I got J.J. Abrams’ “S.” for my wife. I think it was a good trade!

I got J.J. Abrams’ “S.” for my wife. I think it was a good trade!

In Space, no one can hear you Ding Dong Ditch.

“how many people, approximately, have boned in the Oval Office? 44, you’d probably guess, assuming each president...”