I wish.  She would win in a landslide.  She said she’d never do it, but we can always dream.  I’d like to see her throw down at the debates.  

Well this is a total nightmare.  On top of the existing nightmares.  

This is my improv take on something that deserves more than an improv answer: the one consistent thing in your entire thread (no matter how many tributaries branch off from your main river-of-truth), is that you do, indeed, want to have a kid. Yes. Even if the climate goes to hell and Donny Two Scoops manages to…

Oh man I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooo you. I have oodles of ideas ahead of the curve and then somehow end up f*cking up the timing and end up LATE. This has happened to me over, and over, and over again. There is one HUGE idea that I had about 6 years before it became a thing and I kick myself because it’s now too…

How do they not have patterns past a 42 inch bust?  Seems like the body positive movement did not make it to the knitting pattern world yet.  You don’t even have to be very overweight to have big enough breasts for a 42 inch bust.  

Sorry to hear your friend has a shitty boyfriend. My bff dated a guy for a year and a half only for him to ghost her (I mean, how do you ghost someone you’re in a relationship with, in-person???? He managed to do it!) Annnnyhow, then she founds out through friends of friends that he impregnated another woman while…

Anytime people really pressure others into getting a college degree, I want to yell at them about student loan debt and how it’s the only thing you can’t discharge.

I’ve seen this from a lot of instagram “influencers”. Bright and early on Dec. 26th the tree and everything on it is GONE. And they JUST put them up (I know, because I watched them.) It never makes sense, all that effort and then not enjoying it until at least NYE? I don’t take mine down until January and I feel fine…

Counter take: none of the ceramic trees I was able to enjoy as a child are available to me, so I’m thrilled that they’re recreating them so I can finally HAVE ONE! (Yes, I bid on a few on ebay and LOST.)

Yes to this. I remember being terrified to try fruitcake as a child because of how often it was in punchlines. But then when I did - yum! I think a person hates fruitcake only if A) they haven’t had a good one, and they buy bulk-made cake, and B) if, generally speaking, you don’t really enjoy fruit in desserts, and…

The one thing that makes me freak out is that apparently Fred Trump lived into his 90's. Donny two scoops is in his 70's.

I still vote for “two women need to be pitted against each other because that’s what tabloids do”. I don’t believe anything I read in any tabloid. It’s either completely fabricated, or so stretched from one grain of truth that it doesn’t even resemble reality. Reality could be, “had terrible morning sickness so turned…

SAME! My cousin had them very severely, also about 10 years ago, and I was at her apartment 4/5 times a week, so I also witnessed the hell. After repeatedly throwing everything you own into dryers and having multiple “exterminators” hired by the landlords, and still getting bitten, and the sleep deprivation that…

Had the SAME thought!

Maurices.  

Please share your itinerary so we can all duplicate this trip! (Seriously, I want to do a higher-end Disney trip sometime. The customer service there is fantastic, and I find that the people who really like that place tend to go sans kids (me included!))

When asked the rude question, “why haven’t you been married yet?” How about answering, “because I keep meeting men like you.”

I think we need to give people bonus points for running into celebs outside of L.A.. and NYC, and subtract some points for running into them in those places, where it’s a dime a dozen.  (I don’t live in NYC or L.A. and have run into many celebs in both places.  Easy!  The trick is to run into them in the midwest, or…

You could be in your 30s and not get Officespace jokes, since the movie came out pre-y2k. If you were a teen when this film came out, you wouldn’t have been part of the work force, and wouldn’t have really bothered to see the movie.

Anyone in decision-making-management at Comcast should be unhirable elsewhere.