Unlike in this story, I feel confident that you did not end up making her choke though.

Great, now anyone who gets fucked up by a mountain lion just didn’t want it bad enough.

Man, the one time a Dodgers fan stays for the 9th. 

You wanna be mad at him, and stay back, to make him earn your love and trust again, but you’re just so damned happy, and you giddily jump up and down screaming “Daddy!” Over and over again. And your dad says “Christ, son, you’re 35, stop calling me that. And put some fucking pants on. You’re why I left.”

That’s how long it took to find a pack of Kent IIIs, he said

You remember that Sunday morning, two months after dad left, you wake up and notice mom’s hair is seriously mussed, and then you walk into the kitchen and dad is making eggs like the past eight weeks never happened . . .

Har har, very funny guys, with the juvenile references. Can we get back to football and the play design, and talk about the blocking scheme, whether they cut block him? Did they cut Cox or was he uncut?

the Dora Milaje School for Wishing a Motherfucker Would.

“That’s the first time he’s done that this year.”

This is not directed at you, just to be clear, but the defenseless player/targeting/whatever rules have had one purpose only, and that’s to provide PR cover to a league (or, whatever, sanctioning body) governing an innately brutal sport. Just by the language you’ve quoted, anyone can see these rules are so subjective…

only because high school coaches usually don’t get interviewed

College football coaches really are THE WORST fucking people. Good grief. 

I can’t believe that there are this many stupid people to compare it to domestic violence when there’s the legitimately comparable Joe Mixon incident to talk about (where similarly, the victim was accused of using racial slurs prior to being assaulted).

Thank you for this, Diana.  I am a former domestic violence prevention educator and the point you’re making here has really stuck in my craw for since the reporting started.  Thanks for using your platform to educate readers.

Thank you for writing this!

Outstanding, +1.

This comment should be enshrined in the Deadspin HOF.

You made my morning. Thank you.

He actually resigned several weeks ago, but he didn’t think he had to report it to the school.

Sir, this is an Arby’s drive-through.