It’s probably too late in the SNS to get a response from anyone, but I thought I’d revisit my dilemma (dating/breaking up with an alcoholic) from last week. I’m feeling a bit less desperate than I was last Saturday (no urge to call him), but it’s still so horribly depressing, confusing and lonely.

Yea, I’ve definitely been having a lot of irrational thoughts. Not exactly suicidal, but thoughts that I’ll never find someone as interesting as him (he’s a musician, etc), that I’ll be relegated to a life of cubicle drudgery and that I have nothing to look forward to. I think he’s brainwashed me into thinking I’m so…

I’ve learned my lesson here. I’m definitely going to work on looking hotter but NOT FOR HIM. I won’t let him back in after this.

Thanks for sharing your story. You’re so right... I need to really take a step back and process why I’ve allowed myself to put up with this shit for so long. Also, it’s so nice to hear that everything worked out so well for you :)

Thanks for this. Please know another random internet stranger is now thinking you too! We’ll make it through :)

Yea, this has been dragging on way too long. We actually broke up like 4 years ago for a few months. He did the breaking up and no contact thing and I WAS DEVASTATED. I was freelance writing and the time so I had no where to be during the day and pretty much didn’t leave my bed for like a month. Couldn’t sleep, lost…

Under a spell is a good way to put it. He’s always had a hold on me even though he has some serious issues and really, he’s just never treated me all that well. He’s very self-centered and selfish, and I’ve always kind of felt that I was like 5th or 6th (maybe 7th) on his list of things that are important in life. Why…

Thanks for this.

I like this advice. I actually just asked my landlord if I could get a dog and he said yes IF I sign a new year lease and I put down $500 for a pet deposit. Hate the conditions, but I’m seriously considering some canine companionship.

I’ve been with him so long that the idea of meeting someone else is hard to even fathom. That’s probably part of the reason this breakup is so hard. Dating sounds horrible! I’m only 28, but Tinder etc., just feels gross. I also just can’t imagine allowing myself to feel vulnerable and entirely myself with a new guy.

I’ve been thinking about al-anon a bit recently. Do you know anyone’s that’s been to a meeting? I’m just wondering what it would be like. I picture it to be a room full of people with way bigger issues than I’ve encountered.

Thanks for the kind words! I wish I could fast forward six months and skip over this painful part. I’ve calmed down though and decided not to call him. It’s over and I need to keep reminding myself that it’s going to be okay in the long run.

In the last year I’ve discovered that regular exercise has a dramatic impact on my mental well being. It’s amazing and I feel so much more in control of my life. People who say they hate exercise haven’t given it enough of a shot.

Hi everyone. Hoping some of you will impart some wisdom my way tonight. So I’m going through a pretty rough breakup. It’s mostly mutual. We’ve been on the rocks for months (together for about 5 years) and he has a pretty significant drinking problem (10-15 beers a night), money issues, health issues (smoke 1.5 packs a…

Anyone here ever been in a relationship with an alcoholic? My boyfriend and I just broke up, largely due to his drinking problem (10+ beers a night). We’ve been together nearly 6 years and lived together for the last 2. Feeling pretty depressed and would love to hear others experiences.