IDK why it evens matters that the vow taker is "worse". If I pee on a public restroom floor and someone else poops on it, like, yeah, the public pooper is comparatively worse. But we are both disgusting either way.

You can't steal a person.

Sortland had a blanket, a cell phone and a box of Wheat Thins with him.

"Well, he screamed something explicit at me on the sidewalk and I was so touched and turned on that I doubled back to talk to him and now we're a couple" said no woman ever in the history of human beings.

Do you know Snoop Dog? That guy who has put his wife through hell. Who openly loves porn and claims that he has pimped women out before? Not to mention that he is old enough to be Iggy's father. You know that guy? Isn't it so much easier to hate on this stupid white girl than you know, the misogynist that is not…

So ur with ur honey and yur making out wen the phone rigns. U anser it n the vioce is "wut r u doing wit my daughter?" U tell ur girl n she say "my dad is ded". THEN WHO WAS PHONE?

eh, not as scary as werewolf bar mitzvah - spooky, scary

I forgot I drank all of the wine. When I got home and trader joe's was closed. The horror. The horror.

Dude, relax... we all get it. You think it's funny, and that's fine. It's just annoying and pathetic. Do you think anyone is stupid enough to buy it? Seriously, your issues with women have got to be terrifying.

It really is funny when they try this, isn't it? It's like watching me trying to write left-handed.

Troll harder.

The way I see it, it's an act, its entertainment, the end. If were going to call it appropriation then Drake also has no business using a "rapper" voice.

Meh. Once you market a certain culture, and then that culture becomes a brand (of sorts), I don't think it's fair to consider it "cultural appropriation" anymore. Being ignorant of the history of what rap is and is not is one thing (it's poetry,plain and simple. Whether it's good or bad poetry is something else…

This is the advice I would give myself as well.

That is such a good way to think about it. Just the other day, a friend from high school messaged me and told me how embarrassing she thought we used to be and how dumb it was that we spent so much time dwelling on these two boys who turned into major burnouts post-grad. I told her she was looking at it all wrong:…

You can give all the advice you want to young teen yourself. You won't listen. You jerk.

I think about this a lot, what I would tell myself, but I know myself and I know the nature of 14-year-olds and I just don't think ninth-grade me would listen. Believing you are the only one who FEELS things and that no one else understands you is kind of tantamount to the high-school experience, I think.

That being…

"I mean, I thought it might be a possibility he would bludgeon his mother to death then violently rape her corpse, but I mean not like when he did it you know?"

Power of Voodoo

what power?