Fart at her, and tell her you're going to hell. : )

Softbox.

Big ol’ softbox bounced off the ceiling, from the looks of it.

Chrissy and John are so fucking adorable together that I just want to roll them up into a doughy ball. Or something. I want to squish them, the same way that I just want to chomp on a baby that’s so cute. Or sit on them like those cake-sitting videos. Or stir fry them with some fresh asparagus. I dunno.

Nonsense! The real Beverly would perform her own Lasik with one hand, while smacking Wesley upside the head with the other.

After the article loaded, I thought: Shit, my glasses must be filthy.

Thanks! I bought it because it’s so otherworldly-looking, and so heavy for its size. When I’m stressed (and I happen to look up and notice it: it’s above my desk at work) I like to pass it from hand to hand and swear profoundly and filthily in my head.

For those with a Cherokee Princess™ in their special, special, ancestry.

I’ll have a SmashChicken Avocado club, Smash sweet potato fries, and a chocolate Haagen-Dazs malt.

The Nature Company in NOLA was weirdly outside Riverwalk; it was freestanding, just outside the entrance to the mall.

Snyder is not bae.

Prequel: Getting-Ready-to-Leave Girl.

From what I remember, yes.

ZAYNE is very pretty, and projected a slight vulnerability during his 1D tenure, so we want him to do well.

That song was written for Rosanna Arquette.

He seems like he could rock a muumuu and a headscarf better than late-period Liz. He just needs to re-brand.

“Under my plan, generics are free, name brand is $60 a month. Highway robbery.”

Ain’t it though? It’s like the worst Facebook commenters on any local TV news site. I know enough to have avoided Facebook, don’t know how I thought this was a good idea.

Like a mini-Facebook, for a specific neighborhood. Sometimes it’s fine: sofa for sale, wandering cat spotted, new Thai restaurant opened, but too often it’s “I saw a black person!” (Which is really and truly bizarre, because it’s a very diverse neighborhood I live in, so it’s just uptight whities hissing at each…

Yeah, snickering at the drama sucked me in, but when I realized there were so many illiterate bigots with exclamation point fetishes in my neighborhood, it stopped being entertaining.