Actually, we’re the armpit. Missouri is the asshole. It’s not much of a difference, but it’s all we’ve got and we’re running with it.

But, but actually. I just can’t understand all the “Christians” who seem to have never read a single thing Jesus ever said. They are quite literally the pharisees and they have absolutely no idea at all. Guys, Jesus didn’t hang out with the rich and powerful, he hung out with prostitutes, the sick, and those on the…

:)

First you let a witch bless your legislature, and next thing you know you’re diverting aid to Hogsmeade and spending half your defense budget on developing anti-Dementor weapons. It’s a slippery slope, Iowa.

Rep. Rob Taylor (R) attended, but turned his back during the blessing. This, he believes, is what Jesus would have done. “Jesus would be in the chamber, from my perspective. He would passively protest,” he told reporters.

I’m pretty sure if Jesus was there, he’d be all like “where the fuck did all these Pharisees come from?”

Jesus thinks Iowa is the asshole of America and would rather have the Devil sodomize him than go there.

Jesus would be pretty pissed about the whole Christian public prayer thing that they usually do before every session, given that whole speech he gave specifically prohibiting it. I doubt he’d be very concerned about what one Wiccan did, and more concerned about how most of his followers are getting his message so…

God I love when they’re all directly confronted with what inclusion means. If you’re gonna let one religion in, you have to let them all!

Do you have indoor plants? Are you sure they are fruit flies and not fungus gnats? If you have indoor plants, dig around a little in the dirt and see if little bugs fly up. Those are fungus gnats. The trick to getting rid of them is to let the top couple inches of your plant's soil dry out because that's where they…

I once had fruit flies, small gnat-like things anyway. I was so offended because my crib is spotless. The source of the problem turned out such an easy fix. I discovered I had poured some hazelnut syrup in an iced coffee and then put the bottle back in the cabinet without wiping it down. Lesson learned.

I like St. Vincent's Birth In Reverse, mostly for the opening lyrics:

Excited to listen to this as I vacuum all the cat hair that's collected in the bottom of my closet on the pile of shoes where the cat hides when company visits!

I wish I had more stars to give you.

Female Transgendered lesbian air marshalls on the rag.

Female air marshals on the rag.

Anger is a great motivator.

I was really disappointed when Kelly Evans apologized for asking legit questions, while Paul Rand was shushing her. I think all women intending to interview Paul Rand in the future need to take a page from this bad ass.

“Y’all done fucked up.” -SneezingGlitter

She should have brought a monogrammed thermos for her popcorn