Can Dems hurry up and take all these seats already so we can start worrying about horrible turnout by Dems in 2020?  

Trump has already claimed victory on Twitter so I’d love to see that piece of shit have to eat his words (tweets).

aka

“We need the 2nd Amendment to protect us from the government taking away our rights!”

I didn’t do it! 

This story is so, so sad to me.

It was never earned anyway. Trump paid for it. Give Carrie Fisher that spot!

For the uninitiated,swatting is a harassment tactic low level form of attempted murder by cop. 

I have a bold idea: how about governments not air their grievances toward each other via Twitter? Just talk on the fucking phone or something.

Why let some details like cost, property rights, or feasibility stand in the way? Of course it's a disaster in the making. Of the three legs of project management - cost, schedule, and quality - it probably won't make any one of them. Whatever the budget, it will go over. They won't meet any reasonable schedule. And…

Thank you. I was wondering if the Nosferatu comparison had been made already. I don’t follow the NBA so--holy shit that guy looks like a corpse!

“We’ve been to many sporting events together, not just N.B.A. events. We’ve been to Mets games together. We took the subway. He really raves about the hot dogs.”

which leads DJ Trump to parrot the same and admit doing it in a tweet a few minutes following the broadcast

“Larry Fedora” sounds like the name of a third-rate Dick Tracy villain.

Abusing alcohol and opiates? NASCAR fans are not going to put up with this.

There were a bunch of rules

He looks like the fat, inbred lovechild of Robert Patrick and Chris Cooper.

Police first suspected something was amiss when France made a right turn.

Trump is going to wake up to a text message from Joe this morning that goes: “wow, totally fucked up about that show. Did you see it? It was totally a joke. Hahah. Unless you’re into it. Haha. JK. But yeah, what’d you think?”