Garson/Olivier 4 Lyfe.

Ugh - I’m just past my first summer of going to the pool after open heart. I wore tape over the scar and a swimming shirt over that, but because I’m young(ish) everybody wanted to know why I’m moving/swimming like such an oldster, not doing laps, etc. The pain tourists (brilliant phrase!) really can be relentless,…

The entire discussion of historic biscuits, as quoted above, should only be read aloud in John Cleese’s voice, or perhaps the late Graham Chapman’s. It’s pure Monty Python.

The only thing “Becomers” reminds me of is one of the many shifting names of the Heaven’s Gate cult, which for a while was called “Total Overcomers” or something like that...

Totally off-topic, but I was astonished to learn not all that long ago that Mattel is putting out a sexy Wizard of Oz Barbie line. Here’s “Fantasy Glamour Wicked Witch,” for example:

I can’t tell you how pleased I am that, were I to want to discuss the Boy Wonder’s assets with my husband, I would first have to explain to him who Justin Bieber is/was. The only thing that could make me happier in that regard would be if I, in addition, had also never heard of him.

It was great to see that midget and Cruise all crazy and beyond crazy and then still crazier.

It’s the Anti-vaxxers own fault for not going to Dr. Regnerus. Or Dr. Spaceman.

Hmmm... you’ve got me thinking that maybe this is Carly Fiorina’s strategy to make sure she at least rates being a main character in the next HBO movie version of an election...? ;-)

Somebody needs to introduce these two visionaries to the Peeple gals. That would be a foursome for the ages; maybe it could be arranged for them to “meet cute” at the Bratayley funeral? Synergy!

I’m on a fairly restricted (medically necessary, unfortunately) diet, and one of the massive changes (of many) I’ve had to get used to is how tiny a fully, healthy meal can be. If you’re in the U.S., We’re used to some seriously skewed portion sizes.

I would totally watch that Kristin Scott Thomas movie (especially if she actually did a Liza Minnelli impression, although maybe they should just go ahead and cast Liza). But I would be even happier if they cast Egyptian leading man Khaled Selim as the driver...

I pretty much think he’s a Windsor-Mountbatten. There’s a lot of Spencer in there, but he also strongly recalls not only the young Prince Philip, but others one generation further back, including Queen Mary (who was said to strongly resemble “the old Royal Family” that predated Victoria and Albert). Whatever the mix…

I bid my father (and the Evil Stepmother, but that’s a whole ‘nother story) adios a decade or so ago, and it was the smartest emotional/personal decision I’ve about ever made. I’m only sorry I waited ‘til I was 40 to do so. It was astonishing to realize that there’s no law of destiny that says you must remain…

I’m afraid we’re long past the point at which one can expect anything like doctrinal coherence from the vast majority of American fundamentalists. They’re all too busy waiting for the second coming and, in the meantime, hating women and gays.

the roaches shall finally inherit the earth like they always deserved.

And there, in a nutshell, is the story of Elijah Blue Bono’s life.

I think Chaz is kind of okay (complicated, but who isn’t?) - Elijah Blue, on the other hand... Cher hasn’t had an easy time of it, family-wise.

THANK YOU! This has been driving me crazy since this ridiculous “conversation” has been going on these last few weeks. I had open-heart surgery in February, and I can guarantee you that it was many times as gross as anything seen in these videos (I haven’t had the stomach even to look at the post-op pictures my…

Chris, it’s not 2012. You’re not the Republican Party’s prettiest princess anymore