are you sure it’s not canker sores? Cold sores don’t usually happen inside the mouth.

And she does it all, somehow, without looking like she is trying. Mariah Carey could take lessons. 

Yep he’s going to have wondy talk about how not being able to get pregnant makes her a monster.

How embarrassing for Ezra Miller for having to work with Ben Affleck.

How embarassing to be Ben Affleck and having to wait around for Ezra Miller.

FACT CHECK no Mission Impossible sequel can be unnecessary because they are all extremely awesome

I think you’re putting lipstick on a pig. His behavior is basic amateurish trolling. Guys think it’s funny to post aggressively stupid and obnoxious shit on the internet, because invariably someone will respond sincerely correcting them and that’s just hysterical, because... in their own minds they know they are…

“Move Over, Bernie Bros”. Ha, that’s silly. Nina Turner has always been their favorite black person aside from Killer Mike. I want to believe that Nina Turner is going to do some good for Our Revolution, but all of 2016 happened? Are we just forgetting that she decided not to endorse anyone in 2016 after black voters…

Worked on the New York Magazine writer. Hell, it worked on this writer too. She’s falling all over herself to insult him, or, the character he’s playing, anyway.

This reminds me of the time I told my coworker that House Hunters was fake. She said I ruined her enjoyment of that show. I asked her how the hell she thought home buyers only looked at three, perfectly-staged houses and decided on one of the biggest purchases of their lives.

Here was my issue with this. We know a shark’s speed. WE definitely know Michael Phelp’s top swimming speed he’s swam in like 539840958 Olympic races. Why are we testing all of this all over again.

Actually, the sharks inability to stay in a lane would have been great marketing. Phelps would win via DQ, and then he could say he beat the shark.

Ok...Kathy Griffin is weird, but “enraged emu”? Kinda harsh.

Should tucker Carlson have smacked this ostrich? Tune in tonight for the ultimate bird v man showdown.

This is really putting a damper on my pitch for a new TV special called “Is Anderson Cooper Faster Than An Enraged Emu?”

So I guess this means we can look forward to another 6 shitty “Pirates of the Caribbean” films in the upcoming years.

2 million dollars a month?! I could buy like 3 houses and all the fixins. Rich people are fucking nuts.

He needs to be freed from excess!!!

Free? You couldn’t pay me enough.

Johnny Depp is a weird, wealthy hoarder. Who but a hoarder would purchase a couch they intend to give someone but never do? In Depp’s case it is a $7,000 Kardashian couch, but still...