There are, don't worry.

Male pattern baldness, unless you look really, really good with a shaved head. So basically, unless you're black.

Or Bells' Palsy.

And a common belief that doctors won't be able to do anything, IME.

Hey, that's distracting!

The ugliest shade of pink known to man.

And the NFL dropped their non profit status this year because it was a distraction. They're not wrong.

It's exceptionally funny/hypocritical coming from a bunch of white Minnesotans, who a) are overall fairly anti-corporal punishment and b) pretty quietly racist and normally can't abide a black person doing anything the teeniest bit "black". But goddammit, we want to win sometimes!

From the NFL's perspective that's not as harsh as it might seem. They're pretty sure this internet thing is a fad. The kids probably won't even remember what it is in a couple of years.

Sad upvote because I know it verbatim without even clicking the link.

"I'm constantly afraid people will think I'm demanding and decide not to work with me/ be my friend."

Look at his little spots!!!

"Toddlers" seems appropriate.

His Correspondents Dinner bit about his birth certificate a few years back was better than most of the shit on late night TV. It might be a low standard but he vaults it.

Well, he framed me for armed robbery, but I'm aching for that upper class tax cut!

"Also, you're an absolute nut case. Even for us."

Well, if you're a dude.

Something something bauxite!

It doesn't help that the district is drawn "creatively" to ensure it's never really purple.

Aaaargh, maybe he shouldn't have invaded 2 fucking countries then.