Just gonna drop in to say, please don’t attack this program just because of this guy, seemingly an anomaly. I’m a defense attorney in California. Mental health diversion is a relatively new law but already benefits a lot of people, who need help rather than jail time. Most of my clients who have gotten it are young…

Give up a 455 foot home run to a man, and his respect for you as a player is bound to wane just a little.

mission accomplished

I agree, but just having gotten past their stiffest competition, the AL champ could still easily lose in the WS (especially if it’s the Dodgers). In addition to the inherent flukiness, there’s the question of how well teams are playing right now (which, to be fair, applies in all playoffs). But, there are six teams…

I hope the league doesn’t try to file down his eccentricities. You know, pound a square peg into a round hole, that type of thing.

Fool me 13 times shame on you ...

If he’d only knocked a woman unconscious instead, they’d have him back in a month at worst.

“His name is Jock Strap King” and “He’s stronger than you think.”

AND STILL GREY.  STOP SNIFFING YOUR OWN ASSHOLE DEADSPIN.

If hipster delight includes a ring and 3 straight NL titles in 5 years then hand me my fucking bong and Birkenstocks. This logic is why the franchise can get away w/ making their fans piss in horse troughs while charging $300 to sit on steel bleachers in 105 degree weather. Enjoy the NRA spots on commercial breaks…

Thank god he’s gone. Now maybe the Cubs can finally put together a string of winning seasons and win the World Series.

“You should never lead with your head like that”

I hope the Raiders drop him and nobody else signs him. That way, he'll be nobody's Burfict.

And Fuck your Graylist Deadspin.

Burfict having a job has been proof the NFL doesn’t actually care about player safety for years.

What if unrelatedly my pants were already full of poop? What do I do then?

I saw the Fuck Punts open for the Pixies in 1989.

I mean, rg3 is sitting right there. Maybe they should ask him

To be fair, all he has to do is ask himself what his brother would do, and then not do that.

We’re adults. We can sip from a cup, yet our default action is to sip through a straw like we can’t trust ourselves to go lid-less.