If it comes to that, I hope you’re right. 

Touche.  

He can always just get a job on the Supreme Court.

No suppositions here.  Just facts.  America is a better place when Boston doesn’t win stuff. 

I hope to get a nice, long look at it by about 8pm tonight.

Outside of Rodgers and Matthews on the defense, where is all this “more”? The Packers usually seem like Rodgers throwing to some JAGs and Clay trying to single-handedly make the defense respectable.

Oakland did god’s work last night by rolling over for the one team that can save us all from the obnoxious reality of another Red Sox series win.  Now leave them alone and let them do what needs to be done for the good of America. 

God finds ways to punish those who attend the Jazz fest. 

So he borrows a phrase coined by a serial rapist/sexual predator to deny the accusation?

You left out one thing that would have lent a little more context to his “fun guy” answer. The reporter asked him what is possibly the stupidest, laziest request anyone can make if they are trying to get to know someone. “Tell me/us about yourself”.  

Pen is the weapon of choice among the bravest crossword warriors and Joe Flacco is no yellow belly. 

This will all pale in comparison to this November when they find the dismembered remains of 19 people in the woods behind James Conner’s house.

In the future, green will be purple and purple will be green. 

No, I was totally agreeing with you. I meant that if you know your sport is dirty, you occasionally find an appropriate fall guy, in their case Sharapova, to give people the impression that you actually give a crap about doping.

Can they just filter the whole field in that shade of green? It looks much more lush and pleasing to the eye than the actual turf.

Gruden made a mistake, yes, but the Raiders made 100 million of them. 

Glorified Ohioans? Shit, I wouldn’t trade Toledo for Pittsburgh. Also, I don’t care what the state lines say. Pittsburgh is part of West Virginia.

I think it depends on what your definition of “beat” is.  Maybe when hitting her in the face, if you don’t use a closed fist on consecutive strikes, it doesn’t count?  Maybe kicking doesn’t count as beating?  

I believe you meant to say, “Yinz must be some kind of ivory tower librul.”

I can’t believe that this mediocre, monumentally boring non-franchise used to be one of the most fun, exciting franchises in all of professional sports. What kind of a black hole is Nashville, Tennessee?