And get old. It’s awesome for getting guys to ignore you. I’m loving it so much. Fat and old is BONUS!

(Most) men are so easily offended by the mere sight of a pad or tampon, it’s ridiculous. Where else should you have put them? In you purse? They only like to acknowledge vaginas when it’s convenient for them, so when they’re horny. But I can understand your reaction, I used to be like that until a couple of years ago…

That’s when you stuff his pillowcase with them.

Go you. I shaved my head last summer and everyone kept trying to philanthropize it: “Oh, did you do St. Baldrick’s? Or donate it to charity?” “No,I just wanted it gone so I could stop wasting time preening myself.” As if a woman’s appearance/shaved head has to be an act of generosity or sacrifice.

And Michael, too. My college boyfriend reprimanded me for putting pantyliner wrappers in the garbage in his bathroom because his roommate would tease him for it. I was so humiliated. I didn’t occur to me then to be pissed at him and his stupid roommate. I feel sad for my younger self, and I’ll never stop being pissed…

“...But this is a lie.” Yes, yes, yes it is. Because as Germaine Greer put it, women have no idea how much men hate us. They lie to us about it all the damn time, so that we might believe them and trust them and take care of them and feed them and fuck them and look nice for them. All the while they keep their boots…

Fuck Tom and all the Toms of the world.

Side convo, real quick: CAN WE TALK ABOUT HIS MANAGER’S GARBAGE HAIR? WHAT IS GOING ON UP THERE Y’ALL?

There’s not a false bone in Tig’s body. I love her.

Tig was soooo funny in concert!!

File this one under “How Not To Be An Ally.”

Fech is more likely to happen, at this point.

YAAAAAASSSSSS! Go, Hilde! #teamHilde #teamOrangeStreetNews

A post? I say weekly column.

THIS IS NOT ONLY A THING I WANT I AM PRETTY SIRE I NEED IT

1000/1000 would read

thats not shade, it’s a read

Sidebar, I rewatched that movie recently, and it’s fucking creepy. Like, not as bad as The Apartment, but Cary Grant is such a scumbag and does not deserve Hildy at all.

This is amazing. And her parents clearly knew she was destined for this career path when they named her Hilde.