I feel sad for you. The mess that my Thanksgiving dinner plate becomes by halfway through the meal is one of life’s great pleasures.

Naah, it’s delicious.

They are a distorted mirror, reflecting us back at ourselves.

I’ve yet to determine what functional purpose Kardashians serve. They’re like golems cobbled from consumerism and spray tan.

You know what? This sounds like the premise of a great heist movie. Let’s get Kickstarting.

Can’t get anyone out who wants to stay.

That photo is so white it puts mayonnaise on its corned beef sandwich.

That photo is so white that as soon as I clicked on the article it feared for it’s life.  

That photo is so white that as soon as I clicked on the article it showed me a picture of its avocado toast.

That photo is so white that as soon as I clicked on the article it asked to see my drivers license.

Michael Rapaport is why there should be a ban on inviting certain folks to the cookout.

True, but society also teaches Black folks to hate Black folks and yet most of us are able to fight that off. Or at least recognize it.

Prison reform should start with a statement of spending per every adult non-violent criminal sent to every taxpayer on the municipal, state, and federal level. This punishment does not fit the crime at all and stinks of everyone profiting from her incarceration.

It’s so crazy to me that cities would rather pay millions of dollars to black families rather than try to prevent cops from killing them. Like, are we in some Black Mirror reality where America is deciding to pay reparations, but needs every black family to sacrifice at least one kid per paycheck?

Remington’s sales plunged 27 percent in the first nine months of 2017

Yeah, but only a fool.....oh, I see.

Ah, Trump doesn’t need a lawyer anyway. He should just represent himself. He’d be super fantastic at it!

police have only described the suspect as a 24-year-old white man mentally ill adolescent, so everyone can relax because it’s definitely not terrorism

Welp, one of my coworkers is wearing an off-the-shoulder top, time to go fap in the men’s room

Man, I remember when I was 16, I looked at sooooooooooooo many shoulders fam. I don’t know how I could concentrate with so many bare shoulders. Shoulders are the reason I had to go to summer school.