I wish but there’s not.

Huh? Anyways people who want other people to think they like steak alot order med rare. Straight med is the way.

You are obsessed with me.

I like him in the Harold and Kumar movies but once he started doing TV he started getting really annoying to me. Not a fan of his standup either. They aren’t jokes they’re just really obvious observations and then he opens his eyes real wide and waits for the laughs. Sorry, I don’t provide anyone with courtesy laughs.…

Honey, opinions are like nerds. Take a hike.

No, Cindy Crawford had a bunch of beautiful moles. Gwen though? With her pasty skin and white hair and moles? She might as well be your classic witch from Salem, Mass. I’m not saying burn her at the steak, but I’m not saying definitely don’t burn her at the steak.

He looks like a real man.

Ugh I know. She looks like a plastic baby toy with a bunch of weird moles.

Blake Shelton is super cute and I get why he divorced what’s her name but seriously Gwen Friggin Stefani is his choice? She’s so gross with her white hair and big moles and everything. I liked No Doubt but always thought she was annoying and a terrible singer. Whatever. He should go for one of the Neutrogena girls…

Honestly don’t understand how its still acceptable that Christmas is such a huge deal in the US and Ramadan is still a four-letter-word. Seriously, even Hannukah or whatever is more popular than Ramadan. Maybe let’s focus on being more inclusive and not electing another white old man to be the Dem candidate?

Honey, if you believe that shit I’ve got some baseball cards to sell you. Athletes, if you know anything about sports, always make their physical stats look better on paper than they really are.

That’s more politics then religion, and we all know Middle East politics are very conservative.

It’s horrible. I recommend you don’t try it.

Now I don’t feel so bad saying that Indian food is disgusting, filthy trash.

Seriously. It’s actually kind of late, for me anyway. I get up super early usually.

Right. Men can weigh 275lbs but women can’t. Good grief it never ends with you people.

And you’re just not serious about rape.

She’s 275lbs of pure muscle and stronger than Ray Lewis in his prime. Sorry but I have eyes. Save your evidence request for some Bernie Sanders supporting doofus.

Well now that we know he’s a woman, maybe he was taking something.

No. When fans see their stars raping and getting away with it it just shows kids that they can rape too with no consequences. We need a precident to be set. #JPK