Peeing in the shower is the only time a woman can do it like a man - standing up, without wiping and with little concern as to where it's going.

Look, Britney's just teaching Sean self-reliance so he doesn't end up some spoiled celebrity kid. She teaches him to drive, pretends to drop him to give him catlike reflexes, and clearly lets him pick out Mommy's outfit every day.

Well, she is a Gemini.

That's surely Sean Preston Federline. Clearly Britney was teaching him to drive, not fleeing from the paparazzi.

I had a friend in college who - in addition to Bruce Lee and Sophia Loren - had a softly lit pastel photo poster of a cute Asian baby on his wall. And I was like "What the fuck is that?" And he very naturally said it was because all Asian babies are cute. I mean, so cute they apparently just sell posters of them in…

To tell the truth, I don't ever particularly remember seeing a visibly pregnant woman standing on the subway for me to offer my seat to...Maybe they had sense enough to stay away from the 6 train at rush hour. I have given up my seat to someone with little kids, I've helped carry strollers, and I've also given up my…

Awww, did Katie manage to get the engagement ring onto her right hand so it could be in the photo too?

You know we're all thinking it.

It's as if Katie is sticking her arm out to say "You have to be this tall to ride this ride." Luckily, Tom passes!

I think maybe that suitcase she's carrying on her shoulder is throwing off the perspective.

Oh Greta! If it is a drug problem, I bet you're the first to suggest Narcanon. Or Tom Cruise! He has personally - personally - gotten hundreds of people off drugs. I'm sure Sheriff Baca will let him in to see Paris.

Well, yet again - a fetish I didn't really need to know about. Lemme add "foot fucking" to the checklist there...

Has she seen the way Karl Lagerfeld dresses? Wouldn't that be reason enough not to wear it?

Now, now, it could just be tendonitis.

Okay, aside from the photo apparently taken from the "Captivity" ad campaign, I'm a little confused by this tip on handbags:

I think it's nice to see that dads who take care of their kids don't have time to dress themselves either.

Polymer fluff sounds both adorable and space-age.

As plenty of people have pointed out, there's no way in NYC that a little kid can do the walking that an adult can do. Strollers are necessary.

Oh so very creeeeeepy.

Calgon, take me away!