Unless you were rich, 80s cars were cars from the 60s and 70s that we could afford to buy and drive. I graduated HS in ‘88 and the majority of cars in the parking lot were from the 1968-1982 era. Only a handful of kids with rich parents had anything cool or newer than 1985.

Late ‘70 and ‘80's education was about the horrors of surviving and rebuilding society after nuclear war. Black Hole was a pleasant diversion.

Full service in NJ is cheaper than pump-it-yourself in NY.

You don’t even need a noise generator or an app for it. You can just use a fan. Also, don’t make everything so quiet for the baby that they wake up if you make any noise. We stuck our newborns in the Pack-N-Play next to the TV his deaf Grandpa was watching at high volume. The kid can sleep through almost everything.

If you drove it into a drive-thru, it would get stuck. Now an airplane on a FLEXI-BUS would be RV gold. RV GOLD MATT REDONDO!

Tell David Tracy it’s a rusty Jeep.

Most Red Lobsters smell like low tide and the last two times I ate there I got food poisoning. Fuck Dead Lobster.

Once turned into Deviled Eggs who cares. Mmmmmmmm..Deviled Eggs. Gimme all the flat bottomed ones ya got!

There’s a giant ass hole in downtown Burlington (and another in downtown Newport) that would make a great off road course overlooking the lake.

Start checking fuses and relays, might get lucky. If it lived in Chicago, I’d do all the ball joints.

He seems like the asshole kid in high school whose dad owned the local car dealership.

It’s the guy he says hello to at 7-Eleven. 

Scary to think elderly people whose licenses should be pulled can tool around in this.

It’s a long-haul bus chassis. They’re good for a couple of million miles. I think it’s gonna be OK. It’s no Winnebego on a VW chassis.

He reserved one, but U-Haul didn’t have one at that location.

1. What did you steal it for?

They don’t incarcerate, they hang until dead. The executives that added melamine to baby formula were hung immediately after trial. No appeals. Executed. Very large incentive not to do illegal shit.

My best friend in High School used to have my girlfriend sign his excuse notes as his mom. He had so many on file with my girlfriend’s signature that when he did finally present a “legit” note from his mom, he got an in-school suspension for trying to forge his mom’s signature. He took the suspension so he could still…

It wasn’t serious. It was a campaign promise made to get younger, heavily indebted college grads to vote Democratic. Now that you did, they would prefer you fuck off and shut up about it. Until next election cycle...rinse & repeat.

PT Barnum said to never underestimate the stupidity of people.