It’s certainly the most frequently overrated game I am aware of, though by not a very high degree. The general consensus is that it’s among one of the best games ever, while I think it’s merely very good. Really, I loved BotW. I played it for 150 hours. But it’s not the best game ever—it isn’t even the best Zelda game…

Then the games start up again and suddenly you’re on a plane to Hamburg to get first-trimester miscarriage stem cells shot directly into your cartilage.

No joke, I take personal offense in those situations. Who the hell do you think you are to waste my time by making me do things?

Bomb fishing? Why? What do you think shock arrows are really for?

I write in a mongrel hand combining cursive and print. My e’s, i’s, n’s, m’s, and u’s, all look the same. If I had to write anything important by hand, I’d be fired by now.

This is not a bold take. Words are just sounds that have agreed-upon meaning. We, as an internet culture, has assigned meaning to “cromulent,” and therefore it is a real world. It makes sense to adhere to propriety in certain situations, but being totally prescriptivist is for pedantic bores.

You knew what I meant irregardles of which word I used.

Don’t forget that Amazon is evil for employing legions of the otherwise unemployable for double the minimum wage.

Hey, being the repository of America’s grundle runoff is part of the charm.

He can play on both sides of the ball(s).

My kid would just decide he didn’t want any of it, seemingly out of principle. Removing him from the decision entirely takes away the opportunity for him to object, and when the time comes to eat, he forgets that he might have ever had an issue.

I am very glad that when I rented my landlord was a big faceless property management company and not some slumlord who won’t answer his phone. I couldn’t negotiate shit with them, but they kept their end of the deal every single time I needed them.

“Kids should pack their own lunches.”

Anything that results in fewer loitering hooligans is fine by me!

Little late for that, I already locked in the $10 reward cert from Best Buy.

Little late for that, I already locked in the $10 reward cert from Best Buy.

“We’re not going to cut him until the media forgets about this.”

Filmmakers mixed it that way intentionally. The only explanation I can think of is that filmmakers are assholes.

The only thing worse than being bored at work is settling in to being bored at work and then suddenly getting something to do.

Every day I have to remind myself that if my clients weren’t breathtakingly stupid, I would be out of my advising job. Sometimes that works.

I paid the full $60 for Portal 2 and it took me 9 hours to finish. I regret nothing, because Portal 2 is a great game. 20 hours for Control definitely sounds better, but both money and time are too tight to take a $60 risk on less than a sure thing.