Does he just run around talking about how he prefers young women?

Heh, I will become even fonder of my teal eyeliner if it scares people.

Allow me to congratulate you on your grooming habits, which are exemplary!

That was pretty much it, yes. 

Not gonna lie, I’m still getting over the fact that men in my demographic are now old enough to have hair in their ears.

I am short, grey-haired, and about to turn 54. I am therefore completely invisible. Even the weirdos and the drunks ignore me now because there’s no mileage in trying to score a cheap laugh by trying to scare a woman over 50: apparently I’m scarier than they are, just by dint of date of birth.

Worst Xmases, in no particular order:

We have a winner, people.

“DUMP TRUCK!!! DUMMMMP TRUUUUCK.”

I haven’t any words that are strong enough to heal, so I will just leave this here.

Also, has anyone seen that Andy Serkis May-Gollum sketch thing? Its pretty great.

BISH PLS

I live for Tante Angela’s patient, long-suffering facial expression. “Oh, God, can they not get even one thing right?”

It was the dreadful Xmas of 2015 when my youngest nephew took his norovirus and handed it out like candy at Xmas dinner. We were all sick by noon the next day, all 12 of us.

OMG YOU MET EDWARD GOREY

but expressed pride in himself for remaining publicly civil

We had to put up a sign saying NO TEXTING IN THE BATHROOM because we had staff who would go in there just to text, while the rest of us squirmed in misery outside the door.

That boy is the handsomest being I have seen in a long time. I actually applaud his Head & Shoulders commercials.  Give the boy more work.

I myself am coveting the Duchess of Sussex’s purse in that photo. And her hat. And the Sentaler coat. She makes Kate look prim.

Yes and yes.