Our lil Daphne loves her Scooby-Doo.

My hair is still all sorts of tangled today.

Kinda think it’s shitty how people are so negative about the KUWTK resuming filming after ~only 3 weeks.~ Because of course there is never a good way to be a victim and if she doesn’t hole up and hide away forever, fuck her that attention-seeking whore. And whatever you may think about the Kardashians, these kinds of…

I love Martha Stewart more and more every day. Also, I think Ellen Pompeo will look like Martha when she’s older.

The term ‘pap shots’ will never not make me think of gynecological photos.

I would say the biggest advantage to multiple parties over two is that it allows for nuance. Rather than having two positions on an issue, which tend to get extremely polarized, you can have 3 or more positions on the same issue, all on various points of the political axes. This can result in a more accurate…

I was about to think to myself that I have never really lied— no about anything worth talking about anyways. and then I remembered I have parents and basically everything I ever said to them from 9th-12th grade was a damn lie. couple that stick out:

Also that time I was trying to do girltalk (something I’m so so bad at) with a coworker before I actually watched Gilmore Girls. She asked who my favorite of Rory’s men was and I said Dean.

I hated school by senior year in high school, and my best friend had an afternoon work study job in town, so I often got “sick” at lunch and rode home with her. But the principal started just sending me to the nurse’s office, so I upped the ante and began telling him that I had suddenly started my period and had to go…

Back in 1971 when I was in 8th grade, I told my parents I was going to an Alice Cooper concert with a friend. When queried about the artist, I responded that “Alice did mellow folk music, like Judy Collins.” The next day, there on the front page of the Houston Post, was a pic of Alice in full makeup, shirtless,…

My lie cost me thousands.

I frequently bled through my clothes in high school. It was mortifying! I had several dedicated flannel shirts for tying around my waist, dark jeans, and always checked my seat when I got up (yes, it was that bad). If a male teacher had said anything to me I would have burst into tears, and then flames, and then died.…

Like many little kids, I was a sugar addict. Like other kids with hippie moms and dads, I was also denied sugar about 360 days out of each year. Santa actually put carob in our stockings, and the Easter Bunny gave us almonds. It was a sad life, but I figured out how to sneak treats when I could, and I got fairly…

When I was in 11th grade, my girlfriend and I decided to skip school one day. I had already been in trouble for skipping a lot of school, so I would need my mom to actually call with a reason I was going to miss school. So we came up with the bright idea to have my gf call in pretending to be my mom. She did a…

I had a FANTASTIC night filled with amazing sex with a guy I met that very night at the Oktoberfest. Yep - young and reckless and it felt perfect.  The next morning, we were laying in bed with that post-sex glow. He whispered, “Bet you don’t even know my name, Marcia”. I said “Of course I do!!!” He said “ And that…

Oooh, so good.

I can’t stop saying bigly.

Guys, my (Latino) husband doesn’t know it yet because he’s not home, but our couples Halloween costume is now Nasty Woman and Bad Hombre, this nightmare election is finally giving me something useful.

Update: I’ve been staring at that old newspaper photo on and off ever since that day last week - trying to will it into making some kind of sense. After posting this story, I felt like I had to look at it one more time. I just realized - that doll the little girl is holding? Is my doll, the one my aunt gave me.…

I have been indulging my love of super dark thrillers and by devouring Gillian Flynn and Karin Slaughter books left and right (I read all 400 pages of Pretty Girls in one night, stayed up until almost 2am to finish it!!)