Wife and I were camping. On the first night things start getting hot and heavy in the tent. I was having serious difficulties getting the condom on in the dark so she turns on a 1500 lumen flashlight aimed square at my peen. Got the condom on no problem but then laughter erupts from the neighboring campsites. We…

How about crochet? I made an amoeba recently. And a grumpy turnip.

I think the chicken head drawing is a human hand and wrist, showing you what a "rist bange" is; apparently, its a long fingerless glove, presumably like Madonna would wear.