Or Jack Black, for that matter

Maybe it was his beer from the 3rd inning, and he just left it there on the ground by his chair.

Getting back into a baseball game after you’ve already exited the stadium? That’s the very definition White privilege.

Shit I’d do it tomorrow if they could make my car payments. 

Whatever standard they decide on, I just hope it’s reviewable.

I look forward to the day when the rulebook takes four pages to define a clap. 

For the remainder of the preseason, Nagy will make Long barf on the exact same spot of the field until he gets it right.

Billionaires gonna billionaire I guess.

Ships are referred to as “she”.  So the red is to attract sea-men?

Kevin did say the article was about the race to the bottom!

I tried Jack In The Box once, and my ass played “Pop Goes The Weasel” for 3 days.

I love how usually the first people to go after a women’s appearance is almost always a guy who looks like Dana White or Donald Trump

Some of my best friends are black and white photographs.

I flat out don’t see it. I just was like “why is there a weird grid over these people”

I wouldn’t know, I don’t see color, only character,

According to baseball’s unwritten rules, Bauer now has to throw at himself in his next appearance

Um, I made a masturbation joke. This is Deadspin, after all.

I don’t know, but I feel he should be doing it behind closed doors. Think of the children. And their bats.

He’s not the carefree trickster we want, but he is the carefree trickster we need...

Probably not true for the 17 people at the Marlins game.