It's one thing to speak dialogue in two languages, but "Jane" is the rare show where characters act bilingually.

The corporate structure really is amazing. You can pay a scandalously low wage for a minion to suffer all of the emotional consequences for your selfish decisions. Consumers don't have the option of yelling at the responsible party. (Unless you discover the CEO's home address… and somehow he/she doesn't live in a…

(uncanny Cosell voice): Interesting, if true.

Let's be clear: this was not a "good" show. It was a '00s-era daytime soap with stilted dialogue and actors who were cast for their looks.

It was gleefully bizarre. Blend Buffy-esque supernatural mayhem with soap opera plot twists and love triangles. There was a mermaid, a witch with her living doll, past lives, doors to Hell, a monkey nurse, pre-Smallville Justin Hartley… anything was possible in that kooky town!

Awww, now I miss early Passions, the crazy, magical, multi-racial soap opera for a new generation. Too bad it premiered while the genre was on its deathbed.

Watching subtitled Kill la Kill after midnight is a young man's game. You have to be fully alert to pick up dialogue at that speed.

Give or take the occasional Mellie-sode.

Two minutes of Flight of the Conchords is better than one minute of Flight of the Conchords.

And yet, no mention of the cold-open shower dream?
There's pandering, and then there's "take our three girl leads and put them in a suggestive shower scene for no reason except ratings." Stay classy, Grey's.

Given Bob's penchant for cheese puns, wouldn't it be the Garden of Edam burger?

Subverting tropes aside, I wish they would have finished more of the songs in the finale. Richard's lullaby was adorable, but I wanted a real hero song and another romantic duet.

So when do The Sons of Liberty team up with Liberty's Kids?
I bet they're saving that for sweeps.

Hey Birthday Boys, it's your birthday, and you're alone… again

Her version of "Phone Call From the Vatican" in the Broadway revival of Nine still gives me goosebumps. You can't have an ounce of shame if you want to sell that song, and she kills it.

Or, if you're on a cabaret budget, you could do it with five actors (3 guys, 2 girls) and a piano player/smarmy narrator.

Galavant would be amazing live at a piano bar. You could groan and heckle the bad jokes, the music would shine in close quarters, and instead of overanalyzing the cameos, we'd all be abuzz that so-and-so was in the building tonight and just enjoy the ribaldry. When you get tired of the gimmick, you can just goof off…

Austin and Ally and KC Undercover air on Disney Channel, btw. (What? Some of us have nieces.)

Lowest Common Denominator — Brenda Song plays a middle school math teacher with a class full of precocious kids. Her brother (Harry Shum) is the school librarian who also runs the drama program. She's dating the baseball coach (Tyler James Williams), but also has a will-they-won't-they flirtation with the older vice…

I'm pretty sure the jersey was never made. If it was, somebody probably burned them.