So, is Mark Wahlberg just going to play the fictional version of everyone now? Are his upcoming movies THE SHOP ASSISTANT WHO STOPPED THAT TEEN FROM BUYING THOSE CIGARETTES (2017), THE MAN YOU PASSED WHILST JOGGING THIS MORNING (2018) and THAT GUY - YOU KNOW - THE GUY WHO WOULDN'T PAY THAT FINE (2019)?

When I conquer the universe, you will be my favorite minion.

I only come here for the riddles and to see people fall through a trapdoor, so it works for me!

If you're in the same company as Fred and The Annoying Orange, you need to quit because you obviously work for Fucking Awful Ltd.

He created the Bing search engine for Microsoft.

It should be about a nice caring doctor whose patients often joke about him killing them because of his surname, but then one of his patients is really murdered, and everyone thinks it's him because of his surname. But it wasn't Doctor Death. He was actually framed by Professor Kittens - the one person NOBODY…

Am reely sic of the Oxford Inglish Dictenary just adding nonsens every year, and have threwn my Oxford Inglish Dictenary out with the rest of the rubish in protest.

Does anyone else think it's getting cold in here?

*Fist bump*

I don't know about Latvian baps, but I do know that there no yeasted LatvERian baps. Doctor Doom opened a portal to Hell and threw all of them into it.

Thanks for this. I'm a big Stephens fan thanks to this show but hadn't heard of "Vexed". Will definitely check it out now.

Next on AVClub: Pop "Derp" Rivets goes into the comment section of the Alexis Arquette obit and asks who will play Dewey in future Scream sequels.

If all else fails, Discovery can always get Sigourney Weaver as the computer voice.

As would I!

They should have based the main character on Skeletor instead of He-Man. You all know I'm right. YES YOU DO.

Time to call in Scooby Doo and Shaggy!

This is the first episode since the pilot which has really clicked for me. I agree with the complaints that the show has been quite slow, but this was the first episode where the plot felt like it was finally moving forward. Jesse finally met the angels after five episodes. Tulip finally learned that Cassidy was a…

I LOVE Young Sherlock Holmes. It was my early gateway into the character but I'll always love it for the wonderfully creepy horror elements - the hooded figures walking misty London streets wielding blowpipes, the stain-glass window knight which comes to life, and even the evil cake sequence. It's a great movie that…

"It wasn't lies, Jenny! It was akting!" is a line my school friends used to quote at each other all of the time.

Yeah Outlander is being dropped after the finale too. This sucks, man. What's happening to the AVClub I love?!