The "poor people dying elsewhere" argument is utter nonsense. One candidate is talking about murdering the spouses and children of suspected members of ISIS, of bombing the hell out of basically every square mile that a terrorist might have walked over, and of potentially starting a war with Russia and China.

To meet attractive people?

I'm pretty sure nearly no one in the US had heard of that bag of crap before this. I hadn't and I grew up an hour from the border.

it's like a fluffer, but while wearing brown shorts.

I think you owe me 25 thousand dollars now

yes.

old people have sex with one mounting the other and shaking furiously for about 3 seconds?

chimps are apes

just a couple of bros in bondage, yo

I think the author completely missed concerning Pap's song. There's a reason it seems too perfect—it's perfect as it is (and I kind of hate the song/band otherwise).

yeah—in the late 90s Cake was horrifically overplayed and about as "big" as anyone. I think the mainstream had their fill and they've somehow continued on with a core following (honstly, I hate their initial popular stuff so much I can't even bring myself to check them out now)

This is another shocker: you can go to the library more than once!