IDK I thought the “sweeping reform candidate with ACTUAL FUCKING STEP-BY-STEP PLANS” was a pretty great niche but what do I know

I loved the experience of Minerva’s Den and I felt it expressed Rapture’s fall in a more tangible way: these splicers were still at their stations, attempting to do their jobs and maintain relationships even as their brains melted into chaos. 10/10

Says you.

Why are we excoriating the merits of ketchup when mayo is RIGHT THERE? Why does ANYONE want to make their burger GREASIER?

That’s not the only fuckup College Ave made last month: they double charged my auto-payment. Cool!

I met my spouse when we were just out of college and didn’t have money for outside dates, but I’d say my power move was getting drunk at their apartment, pitching my “very accurate Bon Jovi impression” and then screeching like Scuttle from The Little Mermaid during “Dead or Alive.”

“But you were barely MARRIED to his mother and that was FIVE YEARS ago!” Love Clueless.

Tangentially, I liked the Brady Movie’s take on the very real vibes between Marcia and Greg (?? greg? idk). The bit about the hairbrushing during that terrible double date? Excellent.

Two dudes sleeping in a bed together with two women between them because they ain’t gay?

Did you go to college with Thomas Jane??

Ugh, I’m sorry.

cheese and FUCKING rice I am tired of the “concern-trolling as legislation” trend. let’s idk NOT make life harder for kids and young adults who, by living in their identity, are going to have it hard ANYWAY because our society is kicking and screaming its way into the future even as we hang sign party “Live Laugh…

idk I sort of loved and was delighted by the Ryan Reynolds reveal at the end of Det. Pikachu, which SOMEHOW I had no idea was coming.

I don’t want a whole ass pink tree, but I DID lobby my family pretty hard to decorate our existing tree in only pink and white lights with matching ornaments. I sold it to spouse but both children are, after years of youthful enjoyment, on an anti-pink campaign and I was unable to seal the deal. I just really wanted…

Hey. Hey Trash Administration? FUCK YOU. It is fucking hard enough to be poor and food insecure without this kind of bullshit fuckery and don’t even get me STARTED on the asset maximums. FUCK.

OH MY GOODNESS YES oh thank goodness I can go back to sitting on my couch

Dear Question Asker:

It’s Option Two. It is only EVER Option Two. Leaving aside the problem of Pampered Chef being more expensive than the items are really worth (I mean, go to a fancy kitchen store and get the fancy version for the same $$$), what happens if you DO select Option One? Your “friend” will see you as an…

Stacking the two halves of a pb&j is crucial to also fitting grapes and crunchy cheetos onto my five y/o’s plate.

Wow, those wives are going to be wearing a LOT more clothing than the other franchises.

Yeah, that’s the most startling lack so far. I’m suddenly expected to keep track of which episode of Spider-Man my five year old left off? BALONEY.

(it’s a Hannaford)