And when I think how much trouble it took me—a college grad from an Ivy-tier school—to get a job in state government... man, I shoulda just held out and married rich.

Yes, good, thank you. I will have one of each.

oh my god IT REALLY IS ABOUT ETHICS IN GAME JOURNALISM

To approach her was to approach a church as a reformed Catholic might: knowing the possibility of dazzlement and revelation but arriving within to find a perfect collapse of one’s hopes in the face of the dusty reality of a room full of chairs. What promised the beauty of defined features was on closer regard just…

All these people that only know Clue as a movie are cracking me up. Get off my lawn, kids!

Not woke :(

Would it be easier to sell the ruff to a modern audience if we paired it with a modern hairstyle? I say, it would! Show me a ruff with a festival-ready flower crown braid and I’ll bite.

Thanks, dad!

Or, be a cheap sadsack like me and splash some vinegar/lemon juice into the right amount of milk and then watch the MAGIC happen.

Plus also keep it in your fridge!

Props to Rosenberg. I don’t live in his broadcast range, but I’m a fan of his podcast work, and he seems like a genuinely good human.

Even Sean Avery deserves better than Sean Avery!

That’s a very measured response to a person who probably believes that all it takes to be rich/successful is bootstraps! Bootstraps and the sense you were born with!

I wonder if this is part of the reason that on the Day Itself, I was too anxious to even enjoy myself. IS EVERYONE HAVING FUN? IS THIS CLASSY ENOUGH? SHIT WHY IS AUNT ELDA TALKING TO MY NEW FATHER IN LAW OH GOD OH GOD. I thought I was doing well to come up with one color, let alone two! Ugh, I’m getting flashback…

He lit’rally is the Jean-Ralphio WORST.

Joe Mande seems like exactly my kind of wokebae. Thanks, Kara!

Sean Avery? You mean the Sean Avery that got suspended for being a bitch about his ex-girlfriend? The Sean Avery who inspired the Sean Avery Rule on goalie interference? Who interned at Vogue and got an early loss in Dancing with the Stars and is possibly ruining his wife’s modeling career?

omg yes BESTIES

Should I watch this movie? Is it charming and frothy, or is it full of Lessons and Gravitas?

At least my kid eating ice cream is cute and does NOT make me recoil in revulsion.