This sounds way better than my bath salts themed baby shower.

Dude’s name is Eric Holder? Seriously?

Who said anything about conforming? The discussion was about kids her age and I just pointed out that it’s not a typical look. And just coincidentally it’s a look that is common amongst the age group she is selling goods too. Like how the Wiggles dress. I’m all for it if this is actually what she genuinely enjoys and…

It might help to know that Jojo and her family of seven live in a small trailer in an alleyway behind the mansion. The house is owned by her production company, and is forbidden to Jojo when the cameras are not rolling, and to the rest of the Siwa family at all times.

Sometimes, when Jojo cradles the coughing form of…

Is the plot also lengthening?

Something about her extreme nonstop yelling is also thrilling. Around Christmastime, on Live, JoJo utterly steamrolled Kelly Ripa and Ryan Seacrest, not exactly shrinking violets themselves. She yell-sang “Run Run Rudolph” like she was leading troops into war. JoJo Siwa don’t give a fuck!

That screaming pack-a-day smoking toddler is so tall. 

How has no one else mentioned the movie theater/stadium style Nacho station in her kitchen? I’m convinced this is a show house that Jojo uses for filming purposes only, because there’s no way her whole family lives there. Her bedroom is insane, but it’s the kitchen and entry way that sealed it for me. A single crazy…

But they still do Wilmer Valderrama, right? I get partial credit. 

JoJo Siwa reminds me of the Cynthia doll from Rugrats, but with one long bundle of hair instead of a few of them.

My god, I think this represents the opening of the fifth seal in the book of revelations. Welp, only two more to go.

I saw a photo of Siwa at the Nick Kids Choice awards and she was dressed like a 7 year old and others her age were dressed like teenagers. I mean, this is fairly common in the Disney/Nick world where the stars have to be “wholesome” for their young fans but she’s taking it to an extreme level and I predict in exactly…

Being related to a man who shares many behavioral traits with That Asshole, I’m 70% certain that “conversation” in this case involves him sitting at the table bloviating about “issues of the day” for hours on end while she is obliged to tell him how right he is about that thing. Probably while chewing with his mouth…

iT sEemS yOu nEeD aN aNaTomy lEsSon

It is too funny not to share honestly. 

Lmao imagine writing this 

I’m struggling between “don’t feed trolls” and “everyone needs to see this"

I’m screaming! He tried it. 

Congratulations on leaving what is easily the most deranged comment I’ve ever received in my year of working at Jezebel lol. 

It doesn’t matter what size your labia is with this outfit. It matters whether you plan to move your legs more than one millimeter apart while wearing it. Because if your legs move, your labia move, and that bodysuit will end up cutting you in half in a way that is so painful that, you, being a man - can’t even…