Don't Date Robots!

Except Ed Harris bitched about the "flesh and blood" robots and said the company changed to that because it was cheaper.

You're cooking what for dinner?

Yeah, I loved him on Barney Miller… and on Firefly, but I'll always remember him from Barney Miller first.

And I was right.

I went back and watched the scene again really quickly so I'd know the actual numbers, mostly because it's more important to me to accurately quote movies than to spend time with my family.

That's it, 2016. You've finally gone too far.

We don't know how many votes she got, but when they're in the principal's office, the kid who did the count says there were 290 'disregards' and Mr. McAlister says, 'Mostly Tammy fans'

I know, is he James Cameron or Tom Scholz?

You're thinking of Alf, real name: Gordon Shumway.

Um. No. His Y-Wing blew up.

Over Macho Grande?

That's what I kept saying about the idea of President Trump every time he did something stupid (which was a lot).

They haven't yet.

Thank God she was born overseas, so we don't have to worry about President Tequila.

I know, I now feel like 'Romper Stomper' has given me an inaccurate view of Neo-Nazis and their feelings toward the Vietnamese.

I realize that Tila Tequila is a person who would do anything for attention and to extend her long-expired 15 minutes of fame, but is she entirely sure she explored some other, non-Nazi options before going full bore into it?

Finally…..

Does it matter? I mean, what else are you going to do with an hour a week?

Hey, I'm a professional comedy writer.