Why does a guy named Dragon need a nickname?

Surprising how much this one hurts. I remember those Super Dave bits on Letterman so vividly. And how weirdly shocked I was when I learned he was Albert Brooks’ brother. And how whenever he showed up on Arrested Development and Curb, he was always, always great. R.I.P.

“Send him to me.”

Cars?

Yes, and the final stage: “The FBI didn’t warn us that was illegal!”

You misunderstood, Dolly took Seal clubbing.

Ah, the Giuliani Defense.

Step 1: “My client committed no crime.”
Step 2: “What my client did was not a crime.”
Step 3: “Who among us hasn’t committed a crime?” 

Except with more S symbols branded in women’s pubic regions. It means “hope”.

Hit menopause. *rimshot*

I’ll do you one better: how about a semi truck?

Not as creepy as Kevin Spacey’s impromptu “Let Me Be Frank” YouTube drop but a close second.

*Spike Lee angrily tweets Sissy Spacek’s address*

*Netflix launches a team of lawyers at Kevin Spacey's house*

Complete with 1-99 record.

As a Jew, I can confirm that we don’t all “stick together”, but we do have a delightful meeting every month to game plan for our continued control over the media, the economy, foreign policy, and the matzo industry.

Tired & Bleak is a great name for her next anything.

I’d say the soundtrack is more reminiscent of a commercial where a bunch of people of different ages and ethnicities around the world realise, through the shared experience of having the same broadband internet provider, that we’re not so different after all.

Up to the minute news on Owen Wilson!? I'll invest in that!

Imagine watching a teenager forced to cut his hair or essentially cost his team/friends any chance at a win and thinking, “What a team player” and not, “Holy shit, that ref is a real piece of shit.” The fact that they didn’t make him buzz it or even get all of the dreads (but just a hatch job trim) basically…