It does.

I’m not going to “#notallamericans” you, mainly because I’ve seen how irrational and muddle-headed most of your comments are. Frankly, I’m not sure why I bothered to respond to you at all. Apologies, my bad.

Masturbate.

“His existence shows how misogynistic, racist and transphobic this country.”

Yes, but it wouldn’t be state-sponsored.

Yes.

Always.

Don’t be that way, baby.

We need to have a talk about anatomy.

Oh, no, Alanis. I would never dream of trying to instruct you. You’ve got a lock on irony, don’t you, darling? After all, who knows more about trivial, irrelevant shit than you, sweetheart?

You’re cuter than a bug, Alanis.

Your snark is lovely but unwarranted since neither of your examples fit any of the various definitions of irony.

You hush about Jazz Fest!

Cheese generally isn’t vegan. At least generic American cheese isn’t.

Neither one of those things seems very ironic to me.

How is it ironic?

You’re hipstering wrong.

I’m just really disappointed he didn’t say “datum”.

Yeah, no argument here. I just think it was a dumb question.

Oh, honey, I don’t claim to know the intimate details of your marriage, I just know your hubby whacks off about 3-4 times more often than you think he does. ‘Cuz he’s a man, no matter how many balls he has.